i wonder why nobody signed the farewell card for the type of ass to sue for not getting a farewell card.
What’s the opposite of eating the onion? I read your comment and scoffed, wondering who could actually believe this. The I saw the “Not” in the comm name.
Boofing an apple obvs
I vote for this to become official.
Seconded.
Carried. roscoe boofed that apple
I’m leaning towards either, “Fabricating The Onion,” or “Puking The Onion.” I think the first is a more accurate assessment of the situation though.
Picking the onion
This is better than both of my suggestions. The only refinement I can suggest is,
“Plucking The Onion.”
Presuming the onion
When it is in fact, an orange 😌
That’s not bad, but I’m not sure it beats the other suggestion of, “Plucking the Onion.”
Edit: I misremembered, they actually said “Picking the Onion.”
Why is a farewell card a binding legal obligation in the first place? Where are the manners police to whom we can appeal when our brittle feelings have been transgressed?
You could always read the article and find out
You can sue for anything. I can sue you for trespassing in my home because your message is in it right now. Suing someone doesn’t mean you’re right or that you even have grounds to sue.
You’re getting played by this misleading article. There is no evidence that anyone didn’t sign the card because they didn’t like her. If you follow the link to the actual article, there were two other people who didn’t get cards either for the same reason. It’s not in that articles, but I read elsewhere that because this happened during COVID it was just difficult to get people to sign them.
The woman sounds like a dope, but most people are kind and would sign the card anyway. Most people aren’t looking to get petty revenge against people they don’t even know that well.
Except unlike those others, this woman sued (for a bunch of things, not just the card thing), and the judge dismissed all of them saying she displayed a victim mentality over normal office interactions. I’m not faulting people for assuming she’s not very likable.
Karen Conaghan sued the…
Ah, there it is
They’re Brits too, guaran-fuckin-teed they called her Cuntyhan behind her back
Wow, she is so Karen that her parents even named her that decades ago in the past - that’s some dedicated Karening right there! (/s:-D)
As if she had no say on what her name is whatsoever! I personally always legally change my name whenever weirdos on the internet decide my name has suddenly bad connotations, I am at my 5th name this year and already looking for a new one.
You understand perfectly: Karening is always a choice, if only there were more people (like you I guess) that would self-identity by choosing their names to let us know their personality!? :-)
nominative determinism
The judge added that Conaghan exhibited a “conspiracy-theory mentality” and misinterpreted “normal workplace interactions” as harassment. The example offered was when Conaghan wrote “whiz” in a coworker’s card then claimed another colleague was copying her when they used “whizz” in a different card.
The Guardian reported she also complained after a coworker asked, “Are you taking the piss, Karen?,” a popular British term meaning making fun of someone, after she claimed she was doing “all the hard work.”
What a lovely person
“Are you taking the piss, Karen?,” a popular British term meaning making fun of someone, after she claimed she was doing “all the hard work.”
In my experience, the people who complain about being the only ones doing all the hard work are the ones doing more complaining than actual working.
-
One would spend several hours almost daily chitchatting at other people’s desks about how they are the hardest worker and things can only get done if they do it, they’re the first in, last out, etc. But spends half their day complaining instead of working.
-
Another is a serial whiner who says no one else ever does anything, they have to do it all in order to get it done, yet they always have some excuse why they don’t have to come in that day, or have to leave early, take a longer lunch, and spends a good chunk of their day gossiping.
-
Can we please call mental problems what they are?
You can have mental problems while also being an asshole.
That’s ultimately a question of determinism, free will and whether it counts as “being an asshole” if you literally can’t behave otherwise in cases highlighted as the reason.
For example, when a person with PDA doesn’t do something especially when asked to, is it being an asshole?
Or when a narcissistic person refused to do anything that implies they’ve done something wrong before, and does the opposite maybe?
Or when a person with ADHD doesn’t behave the way it’s convenient for people around them?
Most people who called me an asshole in my life refused to understand that I don’t want their social dynamics and discourses, I just want to discuss the particular question, literally. Not as part of finding some in-group and saying bad things towards some out-group, but literally to clarify the specific question. Well, and also some of them demanded respect they didn’t deserve. That is, they were assholes, but I’m not sure you would agree, because you are likely not autistic and won’t understand me.
I also have been rather hostile in situations making me recall my past wounds. Maybe I was an asshole, and maybe the other person could have been more considerate.
This is all subjective, the situation here is that from the description she clearly perceived what others said and did not as intended to be perceived. Case closed.
I have an personality disorder (avoidant with paranoid and schizoid aspects).
Even if i strongly feel stuff that is not adequate to the situation (which is every single social interaction), it is still my responsibility to decide if i act on those emotions or not.
It is also my own responsibility to get help for my issues, which means that i have had weekly therapy sessions for years now, and i don’t think i will ever stop going.
I do not act on my irratonal impulses, which shows that most people with mental disorders have the choice if they wanna be an asshole or not. A person with enough stability to file 40 court cases - which would just overwhelm me, there’s no chance in hell that i would do something like that - is stable enough to start therapy and stop themselves from shit like that. Case closed.
I do not act on my irratonal impulses, which shows that most people with mental disorders have the choice
No, how you act doesn’t show anything about others, and your own issues being manageable or allowing choice don’t show anything about others’ issues.
Speaking of mental problems. You need to take a chill pill bro, why are you being so standoffish? This is a public discussion forum, not everyone is going to agree with you.
Cause I know what I’m talking about, unlike some who just want to shit on a person from some article they don’t personally know. Also the particular comment you are answering is chill enough.
Oh, so you know this lady and aren’t presuming and making assumptions in exactly the same way as everyone else?
Yes, I’m using the information given in the article and choose to not make assumptions outside of that.
I’m also not making moral judgements about her, only about people in the comments showing themselves.
So the bar for you is generally knowing a non-zero amount of things about mental disorders but for others in this thread it’s having to know the person from the article?
Setting yourself up for an easy win by default there, smart. What’s not smart is apparently assuming you’re the only one in this thread that is even faintly familiar with mental disorders and therefore others must bow to your subjective opinion.
You don’t have to know any particular person to know that having a mental disorder doesn’t magically un-asshole them or shield them from all criticism; origin from disorder is an explanation, not an excuse. I know I’d never expect, or frankly want, anyone to suffer my presence if one of my many oddities caused them some kind of significant distress.
I’ve read your comment and found nothing worth an answer.
Why is some who’s “demanding respect they don’t deserve” an asshole as opposed to just someone who’s suffering from mental problems that make them act that way?
Free will and responsibility.
So the mentally ill have no agency? A person with autism is no better than an animal, unable to rise above their condition in any way?
It seems to me that proclivity is an explanation, not an excuse. The same way that upbringing or bad influences are an explanation, not an excuse.
A person with autism is not mentally ill, first of all. We have a few functions reduced or working differently, but in general autistic people are, ahem, kinda stable. You can live as an autistic person without treatment for all your life and be kinda adequate. Though one could also say that about narcissists.
People do have agency, but if a person is disabled in some way, their agency is reduced in those specific ways. A person with schizophrenia paranoid type has reduced agency when they are falsely accusing someone of taking their stuff or trying to poison them, for example.
Similar to how it doesn’t make sense to hate a blind person for not seeing something or a person without a hand for not helping someone out of a pit, I dunno.
Getting back to autism, yes, I don’t think it makes sense to expect social respect or conformism from autistic people and get angry for not getting them, or try to put autistic people in a hierarchy. Autistic people simply exist outside those. Seeing that something exists and being able to imitate it consciously is not the same as being capable. Autistic people should not be expected to obey common hierarchy or group dynamics, because it requires too much effort with nothing good for it.
And getting back to narcissism and schizophrenia, read the article again if you need - the description of her behavior seems very similar to those.
Being an asshole is a mental problem in the literal sense. If you mean the thing more commonly known as a “mental problem”, then no, we can’t because we don’t have access to her diagnosis.
You know why “retard” is offensive nowadays, even though it literally means “slow” which is a pretty nice word to use? Because people overused it to mean whatever they wanted and, unsurprisingly, people stopped liking it. Don’t do the same for “mental problems”.
then no, we can’t because we don’t have access to her diagnosis.
A bullshit argument. Mental health is as imperfect as all the other matters of health, even more. People can get many different diagnoses until getting the right one FFS. People may not get any at all.
Most situations when somebody behaves clearly “weird” are about mental health. Definitely when they can be described as “conspiracy-minded”.
You know why “retard” is offensive nowadays, even though it literally means “slow” which is a pretty nice word to use? Because people overused it to mean whatever they wanted and, unsurprisingly, people stopped liking it. Don’t do the same for “mental problems”.
You know, I’m using it right. The post we are arguing under describes this clear enough. The word “retard” got misused by people like you, not like me.
And no, what I’m doing is better than what you are doing.
I fucking hate NT’s who treat the behavior of others by their own measure and then find 100 excuses to not just give people some chance, especially since their judgement is worth less than that of cockroaches ; more than that, they also judge against those others when there is any ambiguity and think it’s fine.
Most autistic people (especially those who weren’t homeschooled) have had the experience of people around them refusing to accept the fact that they are autistic, because it’s much easier and more pleasant for NT’s to think that someone is below you in hierarchy and\or just weak and\or worse than you as a person, and not outside of said hierarchy. I just want you to understand that your opinion on that doesn’t count. Life is complex and many people don’t have a diagnosis till rather late in life.
But then not being autistic - one can call it your own mental problems - you may not be able to.
How would you differentiate “someone with mental problems” from “someone who behaves in a way that is opposed to what I believe is ‘right’”?
If I can see it, by whether they are capable to recognize reality and whether they act compulsively or may the wrong choice.
Not familiar at all with UK law, but would it have been within the judge’s power to order a psychometric evaluation and you know possibly like a weeklong hospital stay with continued weekly visits to a psychiatrist?
Ah yes every obnoxious and self absorbed person or difficult coworker on earth must be mentally ill.
Not every shitty character trait can be fixed like this, or is even worthy of fixing. Sometimes people are just assholes.
You’re not wrong, Walter…
Eight year olds, Dude
It usually doesn’t yield any good results to force a person to visit a psychiatrist.
Unless, of course, they are having a psychosis and need to be medicated right now.
I was kind of leaning in that direction. This woman is clearly divorced from reality to an unhealthy degree.
That generally requires them to demonstrate or threaten Self-harm
If only we considered verbal and mental abuse to be harm. What am I saying, that’s silly.
Health care has been used as a weapon in the past… and thats not good…
Ruining your future employment prospects over something as silly as a farewell card seems like demonstrable self harm to me
You really want to lock up everyone you think is an asshole?
Nope. Just pointing out that she’s fucked herself long term with this frivolous lawsuit, so not only is she an asshole, she also didn’t think through how bringing this lawsuit would make her look to her future potential employers. That kind of short sighted thinking combined with being an asshole might need some further evaluation.
Not her name literally being Karen though
Karen Conaghan
Could we be looking that the origin story of Karen?
This feels more like an evolution
I wonder why
I hope she decided to sue when she ran into one of her former colleagues at the shop who was like “oh yeah Karen, I’ve got no idea why you didn’t receive a card. They’re probably harassing you” while trying to exit the conversation as quickly as possible.
Who’s the actress on the right in that image? She looks familiar? Katy Perry?
It is Katy Perry’s little known twin sister, Paty Kerry. Some people have given her the nick name of Emily Blunt, but that’s not her real name.
Imagine if they had text under pictures that described them.
Trying very hard to imagine that
She’s that lady who married the Unabomber from The Office
According to the caption under the picture, it’s Emily Blunt…
[off topic?]
My boss’s boss was named “Johnson.” One day, I accidentally referred to him as “Jackson.” None of the people I was talking to corrected me. I decided to try a little experiment and kept on using the wrong name. I used the wrong name dozens and dozens of times and never got called out.
Because you were silently judged. Behind your back. Always.
my inner voice leaking
And…?
And what? Everyone realized you were an asshole there is no and.
Or, unlike you, people got the joke.
Did anyone laugh? Did anyone else start calling people the wrong name? Is it possible that you are this confrontational in real life and no one wanted to interact with you?
For someone who derides confrontationality you certainly seem to what an argument.
I’ll bet real money everyone just avoided him and he took that as them “getting the joke”. 🤣
And maybe don’t expect a farewell card!
So, you’re assuming that the big boss was widely respected based on the fact that no one corrected me?
I was just making a joke, but no, the subtext of it was that everyone thinks you’re weird or otherwise off-putting, so they don’t engage with you.
But there’s plenty of reasons why they wouldn’t correct you. Maybe they thought it was funny, or hated the boss too, I don’t know!
lol why these people getting mad at you for this?
I have no idea. I’ve been telling this story for years and this is the first time anyone ever thought I was being mean to the boss.
Here’s one story about how bad he was. He instituted a policy where we were both understaffed and had an overtime cap. People who wanted to fill needed positions couldn’t work because they were capped, and people who didn’t want to work were getting forced to stay.
a company I used to work for did stupid shit like that too. it used to run smoothly, once in a while there would be too many people on a shift but usually it was good to handle surges. then they fired almost everyone, hired fewer replacements at lower wages and prohibited overtime. then when surges happened and we ground to a halt, they’d start having a melt down and got punitive and started restricting breaks and other shit. jerks!
Emotional damage.
Wow I heard this one out loud hahaha thank you
same
Clearly sounds like undiagnosed mental illness. I hope that lady gets some help.
Based company it seems.
say what you want about America and its ridiculous lawsuit happiness… but I’ve never seen anyone in America sue over a farewell card they didnt get, presumably because they’re the kind of selfinvolved asshole that sues over not getting a goddamn card
Man this story sure gets a lot of traction. Some would say that a story that’s been posted so often and an article that’s 5 days old probably should be deleted.
Yeah I see this fairly often on lemmy, the same stories going round again and again for a week or so.
Usually at least it’s different communities though, there’s another one of these just a few spots down.
