Why does everyone suddenly seem to think it’s ok to say the R word again? I feel like I hadn’t heard it in years and suddenly everyone around me is using it, and I see it on Reddit all the time. Am I imagining it? Is anyone seeing this? I don’t even know what to say when it’s suddenly just everyone in a group and everyone acts like it’s normal.

  • DessertStorms@kbin.social
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    6 months ago

    You’re not imagining it.

    I’ve seen it (and many other ableist slurs) used far too often, especially for a site that is generally supposed to be more left leaning (which tbf isn’t saying much when it comes to combatting ableism because we seem to have very few true allies) but is also full of tech-bros, who love punching down at others based on perceived intelligence, and who also have quite a lot of crossover with 4chan type cesspits, so sadly it isn’t unexpected.

    I call it out it when I see it, and generally block and report, but what I find most frustrating is that mods throughout lemmy/fediverse (again, even on the most supposedly left leaning instances like lemmy.ml) just ignore the reports and don’t remove the comments (I know people are busy, I don’t expect instant action, I give it a week or two in general before I check the modlog).
    I’ve had to block several large communities, most that I’m actually interested in (mostly tech and science related, again, places where people love feeling superior based on perceived intelligence), because I get the message - making people like me feel safe and included isn’t a priority in those spaces, so I refuse to occupy them.

    Whether the privileged group accept it or not, that is the result of using slurs - making already marginalised people feel unwelcome and excluded.

    And when they tell me not to be so easily offended, I link this (or maybe this or this) with the full knowledge that they will probably never read it, but with the hope that someone else might, and that it might make them reconsider their use of certain words (though I don’t hold my breath in anticipation of society at large giving a shit).

    • Vodulas [they/them]@beehaw.org
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      6 months ago

      Those are some awesome resources, yoinking those for sure.

      Ableism and fatmisia are some the last bastions of acceptable and casual bigotry, so they are for sure the hardest to get rid of. Usually when you bring up the eugenics origin, at least for people around me, folks tend to take a step back. Often I lead with that.

      • DessertStorms@kbin.social
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        6 months ago

        I’m seriously not debating this with someone trying so hard to justify continuing to use intelligence based insults that they literally compare disabled people to Nazis (who are not, and never have been a marginalised and oppressed group like the disabled people they literally mass murdered. Fuck you) to try and make their logic work.

        If you are actually willing and able to set your defensiveness and biases aside, feel free to read through the links I left in reply Vodulas, or continue to do your own research in to what disabled people have to say about the matter, not those who aren’t directly impacted.

        Either way, I am here to reassure a comrade, not philosophise with ableds about ableism, you either listen to disabled people and do your best to be an ally, or you don’t, that’s your choice.

        • t3rmit3@beehaw.org
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          6 months ago

          Whoa, I was not “comparing disabled people to Nazis”, I said that Nazis should be an oppressed and marginalized group.

          what disabled people have to say about the matter

          I literally was quoting the links you recommended to read!

          trying so hard to justify continuing to use intelligence based insults

          There is a disparity in YOUR SOURCES between how they are discussing slurs, and I am asking you what YOU believe, between those sources, is the answer:

          • Affinity is taking an absolute stance against intelligence-based slurs in any form
          • Cultrface is directly offering intelligence-based slurs like “ignorant” and “inept” as acceptable alternatives to ‘stupid’
          • Genderbitch is differentiating between “oppressive” slurs and non-oppressive ones, and saying only the power dynamics matter

          I’ve removed my first comment, since it was too unproductive.

          • fracture [he/him] @beehaw.org
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            6 months ago

            fwiw you’ve conveyed the same general question i have about the situation, albeit far more eloquently than i would have been able to

            i am totally down to stop using words that disabled people find offensive, but i need alternatives to express that someone is being needlessly / purposely ignorant or otherwise harmful and is generally worthy of scorn and contempt

            which isn’t to say that providing that is the onus on disabled people (it’s really not, their only real obligation is to express their experiences)… but it does make it a lot easier to action on the request

            it’s also kind of interesting to approach this conversation both as an outsider, but also as someone who these words do apply to in some capacity