I dislike the narrative that you can’t be happy as an adult. Yeah having nothing to do and no responsibilities was cool, but I would not trade what I have now to have it back.
Adult me has an awesome wife and kids, good friends, hobbies that I wouldn’t have dreamed of as a kid, a tool bench full of fun power tools, and freedom to use my free time basically however I want.
I am way happier as an adult than I was as a teenager.
I had a shitty childhood, was miserable in my teens, was possibly even more miserable through my 20s. When I was 16 I told myself if I was still as miserable by 30 I would consider ending it there.
Fortunately around 30, after my low point of the pandemic, is where things started to actually fall into place for me - both in terms of external factors and, slowly, internal monologue.
While I still have a lot of mental holdovers from all that time spent in a depressed state, I would generally say I’m sustainably “happy” these days. Something I genuinely thought I would never reach.
To anyone in a bad place right now, just know that if you stick it out, life actually can be surprisingly worthwhile.
I turn 40 this year, and I really agree with him. The first three decades were just awkwardly fumbling around and getting nothing done because I was a dumbass. The last ten years I really got it together and I feel comfortable with myself for the first time ever.
I was similar but I didn’t compare my life to others, so kind of just came to learn that this is normal life. I found it very beautiful and humbling. I treasure the days of being homeless and alone, so when I need to I just disappear by myself off into the wilderness somewhere for a few days. It feels safe and like home. I reflect on my stoicism and smile about knowing how much I can handle and how little in control I really am. Life is so cool like that.
I see a post like OP’s and it’s just some unappreciative brat that’s never tried to see beauty in life. They just miss being looked after by someone else.
Hear, hear! Bigger problems nowadays, but more control over my life to compensate.
There’s also something that’s really calming about having more life experience? Like back in 2013 I was mortified at the prospect of getting bad grades. Missing assignments was the #1 source of stress in my life, and it was all-consuming at the time.
Now? I know not only did that not matter, but that any given thing that stresses me out that badly has a good chance of ultimately not mattering in the same way.
I listened to an interview with a woman who researched aging and spent time interviewing lots of elderly people. The majority of those interviewed called their 60s the best decade of their life. I also dislike the myth that your youth was your peak and it’s all downhill from there. There’s good in all times of your life, lean into the experiences that are available at the time and don’t worry about how good the past was or how the future might be worse.
I dislike the narrative that you can’t be happy as an adult. Yeah having nothing to do and no responsibilities was cool, but I would not trade what I have now to have it back.
Adult me has an awesome wife and kids, good friends, hobbies that I wouldn’t have dreamed of as a kid, a tool bench full of fun power tools, and freedom to use my free time basically however I want.
I am way happier as an adult than I was as a teenager.
I had a shitty childhood, was miserable in my teens, was possibly even more miserable through my 20s. When I was 16 I told myself if I was still as miserable by 30 I would consider ending it there.
Fortunately around 30, after my low point of the pandemic, is where things started to actually fall into place for me - both in terms of external factors and, slowly, internal monologue.
While I still have a lot of mental holdovers from all that time spent in a depressed state, I would generally say I’m sustainably “happy” these days. Something I genuinely thought I would never reach.
To anyone in a bad place right now, just know that if you stick it out, life actually can be surprisingly worthwhile.
My dad always told me that life begins at 30.
I turn 40 this year, and I really agree with him. The first three decades were just awkwardly fumbling around and getting nothing done because I was a dumbass. The last ten years I really got it together and I feel comfortable with myself for the first time ever.
I was similar but I didn’t compare my life to others, so kind of just came to learn that this is normal life. I found it very beautiful and humbling. I treasure the days of being homeless and alone, so when I need to I just disappear by myself off into the wilderness somewhere for a few days. It feels safe and like home. I reflect on my stoicism and smile about knowing how much I can handle and how little in control I really am. Life is so cool like that.
I see a post like OP’s and it’s just some unappreciative brat that’s never tried to see beauty in life. They just miss being looked after by someone else.
Yeesh that seems a bit harsh…
You might want to use some of that self-reflection to examine why you feel that way about someone when you don’t know what kind of life they’ve had.
They literally said their biggest concern in life was a history quiz… They are literally describing their life for the reader.
I don’t think character length would fit the entire biography, so they’ve provided the important parts.
Hear, hear! Bigger problems nowadays, but more control over my life to compensate.
There’s also something that’s really calming about having more life experience? Like back in 2013 I was mortified at the prospect of getting bad grades. Missing assignments was the #1 source of stress in my life, and it was all-consuming at the time.
Now? I know not only did that not matter, but that any given thing that stresses me out that badly has a good chance of ultimately not mattering in the same way.
Beautiful outlook.
I listened to an interview with a woman who researched aging and spent time interviewing lots of elderly people. The majority of those interviewed called their 60s the best decade of their life. I also dislike the myth that your youth was your peak and it’s all downhill from there. There’s good in all times of your life, lean into the experiences that are available at the time and don’t worry about how good the past was or how the future might be worse.
They may have accounted for this, but I feel like that study would be disproportionately affected by wealth.
Not to say I’m against your overall point, of course.
do you have any info about what year when they’re in their 60s? i read similar research and concluded that its because it was the 90s
I do not. This was the interviewer’s experience through conversations, not a rigorous scientific study I think.
I’m depressed as fuck but even I agree. At least I’m responsible for my own things now. The grind can be a bitch but I can invest in my hobbies.
More tools than you can count on your fingers, like 4 or so.
No way, I make my living typing; I am very very careful about this and I’ve been super successful. Only three fingers lost.