• el_abuelo
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    3 hours ago

    That’s a common reply of children. Usually they learn to not reply like that.

    It’s interesting that in this thread people are mostly assuming the person saying that’s “an excuse” is being unreasonable, just because the person posting is ND.

    If the OP is persistently late for work and they often give shit “excuses” like “the bus was late” then I would react similarly to what the OP described. It’s an excuse, not a reason, because you can solve it but have chosen not to: for instance you could leave earlier to ensure that even if the bus is late, you’re still on time.

    I never get the train that gets me somewhere “on time” I always get the train that gets me there early, because I find it important enough to be punctual that I don’t make excuses.

    • Samvega@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      2 hours ago

      That’s a common reply of children. Usually they learn to not reply like that.

      That doesn’t make it wrong. The people enforcing rules that explanations aren’t allowed might be wrong. Interesting that you do not seem to consider that.

       

      If the OP is persistently late for work and they often give shit “excuses” like “the bus was late” then I would react similarly to what the OP described. It’s an excuse, not a reason, because you can solve it but have chosen not to

      I teach students who live in villages with one bus an hour. If one bus does not run, they will be late. They didn’t ‘choose not to’ fix this situation. Their parents are at work, they cannot afford a taxi, and they cannot invent a bus or wings.

      • el_abuelo
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        1 hour ago

        I think there’s a nuance here that’s difficult for me to express. Explanations aren’t wrong - not having a good reason to break the rules is wrong. The nuance is: what makes a good reason?

        Your situation isn’t a contradiction or counter to what I said. You have a different perception of persistent. If they were late for school every day because the bus never ran then you would presumably tell them to get the earlier bus so that they didn’t miss an hour of school every day? Or if that was impossible you would discuss it an agree different expectations. This alters the definition of “late”. You wouldn’t simply accept that they are late every day - that would be irresponsible and make you a poor teacher.

    • trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world
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      2 hours ago

      That’s a common reply of children. Usually they learn to not reply like that.

      The thing is that I used to not give those replies as a child, but it was always an impossible scenario for me, so I gave up.

      If the OP is persistently late for work and they often give shit “excuses” like “the bus was late” then I would react similarly to what the OP described. It’s an excuse, not a reason, because you can solve it but have chosen not to: for instance you could leave earlier to ensure that even if the bus is late, you’re still on time.

      Lot of assumptions you are making there, and I understand it but if you’re not ND it might be hard for you to understand just how stupid these situations feel, especially when they’re not regarding recurring problems.

      I do encounter these situations a lot less now that I’m an adult, and it’s less socially acceptable to just be an absolute cunt to me for no reason though.

      • el_abuelo
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        2 hours ago

        I’m curious what you mean by ND. Surely there are a whole host of different types of divergence many of which will have no impact on this?

        I am NT (afaik) but I find some things completely incomprehensible to me.

        • trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world
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          1 hour ago

          There’s different types but a lot of them have very similar lived experiences, and they also tend to coincide with each other (people with ADHD often also have autism, OCD seems to coincide there too , and so on.)

          I don’t have enough concrete information in the area to 100% say, but from my personal lived experience, as well as from the research I am aware of, there is a major overlap and common themes in our lived experiences.

      • Samvega@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        2 hours ago

        If you look at this poster’s other posts, they’re quite unpleasant.

        Sort yourself out and turn up on time. Unless there’s a reason of course, but I can’t think of a good reason to be consistently late.

        I’m a teacher, and I hate teachers who just assume everyone can magically not be late, as if personal circumstances don’t exist.