Fuck. Was I always supposed to be able to get to sleep inside of ten minutes? What do you mean my attention is supposed to be like a searchlight that follows my eyes, and I’m not supposed to look through things? Why are all these objects in a pile distinct entities? I thought I had to use the ‘search’ function to return random loot from the pile? Why aren’t these random background noises filling me with a steady, seething rage?
Pain relief from stimulants for me comes from the fact that I’m not thinking about the pain as much anymore (kind of how weed helps my pain too. Just allows me to focus elsewhere)