“Hi, I know you’re sitting there working on something because I can hear and see you typing, but I wanted to interrupt you (despite the fact that I know you have difficulty concentrating) with this meaningless story that doesn’t even require a response from you. I am also going to take as long as possible to tell this story, and will pause until you start typing again because you think I have finished, and then I will resume my story. I know that you don’t give a shit about this story because I don’t even give a shit about this story and I’m the one telling the story. Anyway, now that I have derailed your train of thought, I will leave for two minutes then interrupt you again while you are trying to figure out what you were doing before I interrupted your work the first time to waste some more of your time because I left an insignificant detail out of my pointless story.”