• gcheliotis@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Well first these are the frequent talking points of incels when they harp on what they consider “low value females”. If you find yourself constantly repeating such devaluing talking points, maybe a break from the internet would do you good. Secondly, and more generally, it is usually more attractive to talk about the things you love than the things you hate. Unless you have already established that you and the other person hate the same things, then you can bond over that too.

    • Randomgal@lemmy.ca
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      2 months ago

      This. She probably wasn’t disgusted by the content, but by the form of what he said.

      • Riven@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        2 months ago

        I can almmost guarantee this is what it is. One of those isn’t even a big deal. If I was single I wouldn’t date a single mom, not because there’s anything wrong with them but because I’m looking for a serious relationship, and I know I’m not emotionally ready to be a father and I know I never will be.

        I don’t want kids for that reason. I was raised by a single mom and have seen how difficult it is. Nothing but respect for all of them out there.

            • Riven@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              2 months ago

              For sure. I met my now fiancee on a dating app, neither of us are into hookup culture. She’s demisexual so it’s actually the opposite for her and I’m just not interested in it. These guys are really huffing the 4chan sauce hard.

              • Naboo_calls_for_aid@sopuli.xyz
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                2 months ago

                Probably true, I found my wife before dating apps were commonplace, just what I’ve heard from others my age, I can’t imagine trying to date these days. Also kinda surprising 4chan is still around.

                • Riven@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                  2 months ago

                  Yea 4chan is worse than it used to. I browse the X board which is just supernatural stuff. No kidding, 5 percent is the stuff I browse for which most people would be interested in, ghosts, cryotids, aliens, scary stories the usual stuff but X is overrun by semen retention, succubus, manifestation, literal religious nut jobs, actually literal insane conspiracies, the nobody (sounds interesting but it’s actually just delusional people), divination and spirituality and any and all combinations of all these topics sprinkled with casual racism and xenophobia.

                  I’m not even nitpicking these are common and I just pulled up the app and saw all of the there.

                  I unserstand how some of these could fall under paranormal but the board is just overrun by insane posts and nobody sane could remotely believe them.

                  • Naboo_calls_for_aid@sopuli.xyz
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                    2 months ago

                    Being pretty familiar with it in the late 2000s, I kinda forgot about it in the mid-late 2010s only to recently find out the role of it & 8chan in the junk like q-anon and the rise of the alt-right. Like where did we go wrong?

    • Shard@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      My boi here knows how to hold a conversation.

      A skill OOP seems to be severely lacking in

          • Ashelyn@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            2 months ago

            I believe a lot of the problem with 4chan is that they publicly declare everything, when a lot of it should really be contained to a private scope

            • abbadon420@lemm.ee
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              2 months ago

              We, the plebs, do enjoy the public declarations of 4chan though. It’s like how normies enjoy gossip magazines to hear what bullshit some actor has done this week. In both cases, people also like to complain how bad it is to like those things.

    • NastyNative@mander.xyz
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      2 months ago

      Incels? there are plenty of family men that think this way. They stuck to their preferences and have a much better life for it. We shouldn’t marginalize them for it and give them names that don’t make any sense also being afraid to speak about preferences is not good.

      • abbadon420@lemm.ee
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        2 months ago

        If an incel becomes a family man, he isn’t an incel anymore. It’s part of the definition of incel. Also, they don’t have a better life for it, but a better life despite it (if they even have a better life, incels tend to sabotage their own happines). And you say we shouldn’t marginalise men,but it’s okay to marginalise women?

          • abbadon420@lemm.ee
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            2 months ago

            Basic human society. Hunters and gatherers did it too.

            People formed tribes to build a circle of trusted people, those outside the tribe were not trusted by default. It was a basic survivval technique. Tribesmen who broke the trust were kicked out. People who wanted to join the tribe had to prove their trustworthiness.

            Inclusivity people are a global tribe. You are not in the tribe because you have proven yourself not trustworthy. You cannot be trusted to treat all tribe members with respect. If you want to be back in the tribe, you will have to prove yourself.

            • NastyNative@mander.xyz
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              2 months ago

              For some one that is offended by 3 preferences and talks all this inclusivity. You are a hypocrite!

              • abbadon420@lemm.ee
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                2 months ago

                Not at all. It is just that these two groups don’t go together. You are free to choose either. If you want to play with the other incels, that is fine. If you want to join the inclusivity group that is fine, you are welcome, that is the essence of inclusivity. But you cannot be in both.

      • gcheliotis@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Preferences are fine. It still matters how you express them. In the current zeitgeist, with inceldom being a thing, the way these preferences were expressed smacked of that. The fact that you want to defend this specific trifecta of otherwise completely unrelated preferences, claiming they lead to a better life, makes me think you might be an incel yourself, or maybe just a conservative who’s consumed a few too many such videos promoting “family values” and purporting that these are threatened by a woman’s weight, or her having to raise a child on her own, or her seeking love and attention on dating apps. Truth is these are pretty much unrelated to whether one values family and to each other. It’s just a collection of caricatures, stereotypes, and cautionary tales circulating in conservative circles. If all one can think of when asked for their preferences regarding a partner are these known talking points, it is a little suspect. FWIW, I do not think we should marginalize conservatives. But I do think we should marginalize misogyny.

        • NastyNative@mander.xyz
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          2 months ago

          How you express them is crazy lol… express them by not being afraid. Never be afraid to say them so it can be heard and respected. You talk all this inclusivity and shit on incels.

          • gcheliotis@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            Hmm I am not sure I understand what you’re saying or that you understood anything I said. Maybe we are talking past each other. Nevermind, let’s forget about incels. Main point is whatever your preferences, framing them positively helps.