most of the people listing their skills here are skills that require a functioning civilization in order to use.

I have watched a frankly absurd amount of youtube survival videos. I am reasonably certain i could survive long enough to die of starvation since the foraging aspect of survival never really interested me enough

I’m really snarky. What everyone really craves in trying times is a relentless stream of inane criticism.

I have the ability to provide constant unyielding optimism as long as no one ever asks me how I’m doing

Nice try skynet.

I’m a first-waver and I’m fine with that. The world is shit enough as it is, and I’m tired. Apocalypse? Not interested. Have at it.

I’m not particularly good at any one thing. I have a PhD, but not in a subject that’s “practical” in the post apocalypse. I’m physically fit enough, but I’m not a paragon of strength or agility. Relatedly, I’m in my mid30s, so not old, but not spry either. I’m handy enough to fix things with instruction and some light jury-rigging, but I’m hardly a Macguyver-type. I’ve never fired a gun before, but I can probably learn to use one.

Assuming I’m not killed instantaneously, or shortly thereafter, I’m an extra set of hands or an additional mouth to feed, depending on your perspective. Charitably, I’m analytically-minded and useful enough in the field, low to middle management type; less charitably, I’m an NPC type that happens to have some amusing dialog.

In a movie or tv show following a group in the post apocalypse, I think I’d be like the 4th to die; dignified enough to have established a minor story arch, but certainly not enough to be a main character. Also not so unimportant that I’m killed off screen (or worse yet, ret-conned).

I’m tasty.

Woot! I’ve been poor all my life, so I have experience gardening and foraging. I know the difference between poison hemlock and wild carrot, I can identify herbs that can heal, I know how to choose the best trees for food from syrup to bark bread, and I know which fruits and veggies grow best in which area

I’m also a mortician, so went through 4 years of INTENSE medical education, fighting against the students trying to become doctors. (I hate bell curves) I can cleanly dissect a body, know about ailments/diseases/biohazards, I’m not afraid of blood or wounds, can stitch up lacerations, and know which parts of the body to hit and bring an enemy down… probably should have led with that

I’ve done some stand up and I am willing to hurt myself for others amusement. I am probably going to end up some warlords court jester.

Whacky sleep schedule, I can always cover for someone who might need to rest

I really don’t get people who watch Mad Max movies and think they’re going to be Auntie or Immortan Joe (as if they ended up doing so well themselves anyway). And even if you are, who wants to be king of a pile of shit?

Makes no sense to me.

I can sleep through anything.

Wake me up when they reestablish the society.

I can brew beer, bake bread, make wine, kill animals, preserve meat without a refrigerator, make sausages.

I’m exceptionally charismatic and can become friends with literally everyone.

That’s a useful talent even pre-apoc.