• teslasaur@lemmy.world
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    13 hours ago

    Or, just maybe. The person remarking is an asshole. It gives off the same energy as correcting grammar when talking with someone.

    • Corgana@startrek.website
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      13 hours ago

      Why does the other persons energy matter? If someone requests not to be called something and you continue to call them that then you are kinda being a jerk.

      • teslasaur@lemmy.world
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        11 hours ago

        Cause it’s rude. Like correcting grammar in a conversation. Both would be equally rude.

        Nobody wants to be told that what they’ve learned and have been taught to them their whole life is now an offense. Just like nobody wants to be misgendered on purpose.

          • teslasaur@lemmy.world
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            10 hours ago

            Being told you’re an idiot and everything you’ve learned is wrong in front of others is “yikes”

            • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
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              9 hours ago

              Or you could’ve simply gone “cool no worries didn’t mean anything by it” and move on not using the word instead of demanding they let you continue to do it.

              • teslasaur@lemmy.world
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                9 hours ago

                “The earth is flat”. “Ok, cool. Didn’t mean anything by it.”

                A bit hyperbolic, but that is how i imagine it sounds to older people. Perspective goes both ways.

                • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
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                  9 hours ago

                  I’m just going to ignore how much of a stretch that is to compare and indulge it anyway.

                  You know what you do when someone says something stupid like that? You don’t engage it at a table full of people unless you all know each other pretty well and you think the relationship can handle it unless you’re just kind of a rude person who doesn’t mind publicly shaming people when there is nothing at stake, which is a little weird.

                  Most people like that get ignored when in-person and it’s the best way to go about it. Engaging them is what they want. They want to defend their position, they want to feel persecuted, and they want to share whatever XxpatriotxX shared on YouTube the night before.

                  • teslasaur@lemmy.world
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                    8 hours ago

                    But the post talks about a party, where the person feeling that they are correct feel justified in talking down to someone else in front of everybody. Good that we agree that publically lecturing is rude.

                    Eventually all of us will be labeled as intolerant, or as having being intolerant according to the changing sensibilities. I can just say that i try to not be rude to individuals or their intellect, but i also don’t really care if people are generally offended by ‘things’. Unless they went out of their way to diminish another person, and what that entails differs depending on the origin of ‘the offender’.

    • GrammarPolice@lemmy.world
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      11 hours ago

      It gives off the same energy as correcting grammar when talking with someone.

      Is this a personal attack?

    • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
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      10 hours ago

      If someone asks you to stop something simple and of no consequence to you just do it out of respect. Why does everyone feel entitled to a concrete argument and being convinced before just respecting folks? It’s ridiculous.

      My parents hate curse words. I curse a fuck ton. When I’m at their house, I don’t curse (well…as much). I don’t demand a sufficiently acceptable reason for not doing it any more than I don’t need someone explain to me why they want me to take my shoes off in their home. Just don’t be an ass and do it. Don’t demand an explanation like you’re some hot shit being wildly burdened.

      Someone called someone “the R word” at my house in front of my kids. I just said “don’t use that word please” and that was the end of it. Didn’t talk about my kids or ableism or anything, I just said “stop please,” they just said “cool sorry” and moved on. This is just how it should be most of the time.

      • mnemonicmonkeys@sh.itjust.works
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        5 hours ago

        If someone asks you to stop something simple and of no consequence to you just do it out of respect. Why does everyone feel entitled to a concrete argument and being convinced before just respecting folks? It’s ridiculous.

        What about half of the people in the comments seem to fail to understand is that the way the lady correcting OP’s language is the biggest factor.

        Her saying “hey, could you please not refer to me as a guy?” is completely different from her getting angry and going off on a rant. The former situation is worth continuing the discussion, and the latter situation leads to people rightfully avoiding that lady.

      • kipo@lemm.ee
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        6 hours ago

        The fact that you’re getting downvoted for essentially saying “just be a respectful, reasonable, and decent human being” is pretty bizarre. Like, can we just have some empathy and patience for each other?

    • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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      11 hours ago

      It’s just as much not a problem for them to be offended by it as it is for you to choose your words better. Knowing that you made a choice to offend so yeah, you’re the jerk. You’re honestly making a lot more of it if you went all this distance to think you’re the one hard done by just cuz you refuse to memorize some words. That’s snowflake thinking.

      Only bad actors looking for the drama go for the path of most resistance.

          • Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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            1 hour ago

            No, that’s different. Names occupy a different role than generic words, and you’re primed to be able to handle that. To claim that’s the same thing as replacing common words is dishonest or uninformed.