Yep that’s me. To be honest I only know one trans woman, but I knew her since she was like 14 and she’s only transitioned a few years back. I sometimes accidentally used her old name or gender which was met with anger, leaving the room and slamming the door most of the time.
She’s doing better now the transition is over, but I mainly stick with silence or safe topics now. I definitely don’t talk about the past anymore because that is like walking through a minefield.
That’s my worst failing too. It’s harder to reprogram the way our brains process names and identity than is even fair. I meet someone during or after transition, it’s easy peasy. Meet them before, especially long before, and it can take a year or more to be certain I never screw up. Yeah, after a month or so, it becomes rare, but sure as hell something about the past will come up and my brain slips a gear.
It would be nice if the brain (mine in particular) was a wee bit easier to repattern things like that
Yep that’s me. To be honest I only know one trans woman, but I knew her since she was like 14 and she’s only transitioned a few years back. I sometimes accidentally used her old name or gender which was met with anger, leaving the room and slamming the door most of the time.
She’s doing better now the transition is over, but I mainly stick with silence or safe topics now. I definitely don’t talk about the past anymore because that is like walking through a minefield.
That’s my worst failing too. It’s harder to reprogram the way our brains process names and identity than is even fair. I meet someone during or after transition, it’s easy peasy. Meet them before, especially long before, and it can take a year or more to be certain I never screw up. Yeah, after a month or so, it becomes rare, but sure as hell something about the past will come up and my brain slips a gear.
It would be nice if the brain (mine in particular) was a wee bit easier to repattern things like that