Social status (in my own words) is the idea that a person has a relative social worth in a certain context. For example in a class room a teacher has a high social status and therefore must be listened to. On the other hand, if that same teacher was stopped by the police for speeding, they would not have a relatively low status compared to the police officer and should therefore listen to the police officer.
Basically you are expected to treat some people with more deference than others based upon status signifiers like what role they have and what clothing they are wearing or how they speak or act towards to you.
I guess you could say it is a widely held belief that some people are better or more important than others.
How would you approach explaining that idea to a child? When is age would be too soon? When would it make sense to explain that it is a person’s social status is not always justified (i.e cops, bosses, parents)? Traditionally, I guess they would learn it by trial and error but I don’t necessarily think they would learn the idea that it is often abused to control others in a school setting since authority figures generally don’t want others questioning them.
Do you really need to explain this to a child?
I would only if they ask me, or if I see a clear and worrying behavioral problem. Children should do as teachers say, within reason- if the teacher is abusing their position in any way, I don’t see how knowing social status helps a child. It’s more important they know their rights.
To answer the age part of your question at least, if the child understands what kings and princesses are about (very popular in children’s stories and play pretends, I’m not a royalist) then they are old enough to understand what social status is imo.
Do you really need to explain this to a child?
I never said that you do. I asked how you could explain it.
I think it would be very helpful to help a kid understand why some behaviors are only okay in certain contexts. IE It’s okay for a parent to yell at a kid but if a kid yells back they get in trouble. If a kid can understand that authority is not always justified, then it can help them by ensuring they don’t blindly follow authority figures when they are wrong or acting maliciously.
Sure, that’s why there is so much talk about fairness, and I mentioned it’s more important they know their rights. It’s easier to explain a child they need to be treated fairly by everyone, and/or that nobody has the right to touch their body if they don’t want to for example, than to go about explaining abuse of authority.
If you are after an ELI5 on social status I’d say it’s more like a ranking of likeability and authority. The more authority you hold, the higher your status, and the same goes for being likeable. If nobody likes you and you have no authority over anyone… or anything, then you are going to be very low in status.
I never said that you do. I asked how you could explain it.
I would simply explain it when they start getting older and can start seeing it. It doesn’t need to be explained immediately.
Well first its not “social status” your describing but authority. Thats the word your looking for. I feel like authority is pretty cut and dry, those people have the ability to punish you if you don’t comply.
Some people have more friends than others.
Part of that is how friendly they are. Part is how pretty they are. Part is how smart they are and how able they are to help others. But part is how much they can afford to throw fancy parties, go to expensive schools, or get good health treatments.
The more friends you have, and the more friends your friends have, the more you can get done in society. If you want to start a business, get elected, or other things that require a lot of other people’s support, having lots of friends helps.
Sure it’s not fair. What you can do is figure out how to be a good friend to those around you and work well with others. This includes things called “allyship” and “solidarity” as well as just being nice to people and having useful skills.
That is much simpler and kid friendlier way than I could come up with. Kudos! A minor nitpick is that use the word friend implies that they are a peer, which in the case of role based status like a teacher doesn’t really fit.
I guess what I am looking for is a way to explain the double standard where its thought of as okay teacher or parent to yell but it is frowned upon if a kid does it.
I guess what I am looking for is a way to explain the double standard where its thought of as okay teacher or parent to yell but it is frowned upon if a kid does it.
Oh, well that’s not social status as such. It’s also “okay” in mainstream society for a police officer to yell at a corporate VP situationally, even though the VP has more buddies and more money and a better health plan and a hotter partner than the police officer does.
Good explanation, just watch out so the kid does not start being wired with it’s friends. Maybe explain different kinds of friends.
This is exactly what i was thinking…
This is a perfect explanation for a sub-18 yo…
To a child, not so much…
But again, this is 2023, children these days are waaaaay smarter than us back in the 90’s
Well, you could just have the kids watch My Little Pony to learn about the power of friendship.
I’d differentiate between “social status” and “authority”.
Social status = social hierachy/worth inside a group, e.g. a class where you have “losers” and popular kids. Or inside a shop where sometimes employees serve people very differently regarding their appearance (Client with much money? Client looking poor?).
Authority = rolls given by system/government/laws, e.g. Police that have authority over citizens
The first is more invisible and vague, while the second is something that is tangible.
Thats at least my take :D
Also, your kid might already know these concepts, at least unconsciously. I’d try to teach them modesty and repaying kindness with kindness and not weighting the social status too much but also consider the personality. The most popular kids in class aren’t the kindest in most cases.
Just show them a picture of a homeless person next to a beautiful celebrity and ask them with whom they’d like to hang out with.
Depending on their age they probably are already familiar with the concept without realizing itMost celebs are, well… not role-models you’d want for your child
And still are more desirable than the most sweetest, kindest homeless person.
It’s sad, but that’s how it is for most.
I’m right and you’re wrong. I’m big and you’re small. And there’s nothing you can do about it.
I wouldn’t
Have you ever considered that that is just an improper and wrong world view. Like literally what the fuck Are you actually out here judging people based on their jobs and or economic backgrounds and using that to decide how you interact with them. Everyone should be treated equally until they have proven they do not deserve to be treated with such a level of respect.
Have you ever considered that that is just an improper and wrong world view.
I agree that it is theoretically the wrong way to view the world. However it is how the world works, if you treat a cop like some people treat a service worker like a waiter you could easily be shot.
Are you actually out here judging people based on their jobs and or economic backgrounds and using that to decide how you interact with them
Personally, I do try avoid ranking others via social status but it is pervasive in society. If you don’t understand that people unfairly judge you based on your income, class, gender, role, or any other factor, it makes dealing with issues like sexism and racism a lot harder.
Seemed like it was more about how to react to authority and who has that authority in which situation. If some random dude told me to show my license and registration I’d ask him how that’s his business and to kindly leave me alone, if a cop asks that it’s a good idea to comply.
It’s so complex and nuanced that if you try to explain your kid will inevitably run headlong into an exception in spectacular fashion.
It takes a life time to learn social status and queues.
Explain specific situations and leave it at that
Ask the child, how much friends doest he/she have; then ask her about that famous kid in class.
That’ll stir any one up real quick 🤣
PS: The aim is not to “walk over your child’s feelings”; rather, showing the effect of social “scores” in real life…
Through this, he/she will start pointing out why the famous kid is “that famous”,
- how does this kid treat others
- how the kid talks
- background (parents, neighbour-hood, etc)
With the aim of finding out why the other kid is famous… a fun miniature project 😊
“If you can’t explain it to a five year old, you don’t actually understand it yourself”
No offense intended, because I couldn’t explain this to an adult either.
That is part of why I asked it. I want to be able to understand it and hopefully teach it to my nieces and nephews better.
Might want to try talking about this with their parents instead then
This right here, is one of the major reasons for fall-offs… you really should take this to the parents first, PRONTO.
Take my upvote good sir!
I would start by asking my question over at [email protected]
See your star chart, social status is the same. If you litter you have low social status.
