• SattaRIP@kbin.social
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    11 months ago

    While there can be some healthy trends in these online communities, we should look at it from other angles as well. How does it compare to just getting therapy? Does growing some emotional intelligence turn men into incel terrorists the way a blackpill site might? How do these communities loom from the outside?

    Let’s assume that the toxic males among MGTOW are just a loud minority. Why would you still want to hang out there? There’s plenty of supportive spaces, both online, and IRL that don’t include men who call women trash. Tolerance of intolerance and all that.

    If MGTOW stuck to the goal stated in their name, I’d have been happy to stay with them. But even the most reasonable men I found who identified as MGTOW often had sexist tendencies.

    • rekabis
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      2 months ago

      But even the most reasonable men I found who identified as MGTOW often had sexist tendencies.

      And a majority of women out there would make these “sexist men” look like rank amateurs in comparison.

      Just look at all the things that women nail men to the wall with, when considering long-term partners, for starters. Has to make more money - check. Has to be in a socially prestigious career - check. Needs to be taller - check. Needs to be stronger - check. Cannot be disabled - check. Needs to be funny - check. Needs to shoulder most to all of the conversation - check. Needs to acquiesce to the woman’s demands - check. Needs to be the one who shoulders all of the first-approach risk - check. Needs to “be a man” in many situations where any risk is involved - check. The list goes on and on to hundreds of widely-accepted “traditional roles” that men must occupy and conform to, in one capacity or another. And men are “not men” and utterly ignored by women if they violate or even push back on any of these “non-negotiable” points.

      And yet, it is “misogyny” if a man asks most women to be in any way “traditional”.

      That is the dictionary definition of society as a whole employing gender bigotry. Maybe you need to ask yourself where men’s sexism is coming from… because for any man with open eyes, we’re becoming rank amateurs in the gender bigotry department.

      “Kill all men”

      Imagine saying the obverse, with the gender flipped. In any society without a severe gender bias, both versions would be equally palatable/unpalatable. The fact that the above is widely celebrated and lauded, while the flipped version is a shining example of evil and hate, only shows where the bulk of gender bigotry is pointing. And it ain’t at women.

    • rekabis
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      2 months ago

      But even the most reasonable men I found who identified as MGTOW often had sexist tendencies.

      And a majority of women out there would make these “sexist men” look like rank amateurs in comparison.

      Just look at all the things that women nail men to the wall with, when considering long-term partners, for starters. Has to make more money - check. Has to be in a socially prestigious career - check. Needs to be taller - check. Needs to be stronger - check. Cannot be disabled - check. Needs to be funny - check. Needs to shoulder most to all of the conversation - check. Needs to acquiesce to the woman’s demands - check. Needs to be the one who shoulders all of the first-approach risk - check. Needs to “be a man” in many situations where any risk is involved - check. The list goes on and on to hundreds of widely-accepted “traditional roles” that men must occupy and conform to, in one capacity or another. And men are “not men” and utterly ignored by women if they violate or even push back on any of these “non-negotiable” points.

      And yet, it is “misogyny” if a man asks most women to be in any way “traditional”.

      That is the dictionary definition of society as a whole employing gender bigotry. Maybe you need to ask yourself where men’s sexism is coming from… because for any man with open eyes, we’re becoming rank amateurs in the gender bigotry department.

      “Kill all men”

      Imagine saying the obverse, with the gender flipped. In any society without a severe gender bias, both versions would be equally palatable/unpalatable. The fact that the above is widely celebrated and lauded, while the flipped version is a shining example of evil and hate, only shows where the bulk of gender bigotry is pointing. And it ain’t at women.