Dating is odd to me. I do not really know what my motivations are. If I actually find someone. What then? What will we do? How different will our relationship be from a regular friendship (besides you know what). And should it be?
Should you be wanting to do other things with your SO then a very good friend?
What I’m getting at is, have you ever thought to someone: “They don’t really want a relationship they just want a one particular friend with benefits.”
I don’t know if I’m rambling over here. But I’m really having difficulty digesting this one.
Edit: The reason I ask is because I’m thinking to start dating again but I don’t know my end goal.
I think this is all personal preferences, but by default many times with an SO you usually are both building towards a common goal together to cement your future together. Again, I’m sure that’s not the case for everyone but I am just speaking generally.
With a “very good friend” that might not necessarily be the case - but these lines can all get very fuzzy depending on people’s outlooks, perspectives, wants etc.
I probably haven’t given you much clarity here but I also think many people have wrestled with at one point or another in the dating world.
For me: SO (and if they’re not the same: spouse) is more about becoming a team.
With a really good friend, unless you have something very special, you’ll probably not tether your lives together and commit to going through the rest of your days together.
There’s something that happens over time when you have that commitment that really bonds you (so I’ve found). I haven’t felt it with a friend, and the closest I’ve come to it otherwise is with family (though there’s even less commitment between family members, I’ve found).
It’s hard, but it’s also great.