Lowly unnamed ensigns say “Your job must suck,” but you stare back at them with confidence and tell them “It sure does.” When someone spills hot chocolate on the captain, you’re the one that swoops in after. Exploding consoles throwing rocks across the bridge? Guess who’s their go-to-guy? That’s why, today, we salute you Mr Bridge-Crud-Sucker-Upper!

Can they beam dirt off the bridge to clean up?