• Nougat@fedia.io
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    8 months ago

    Can someone explain to me what makes people need to publicly express their sexual urges? Like, what do you get from this comment? It’s not like it’s going to get you laid. The only effect it has is making people who have no interest in knowing about your turgidity know about your turgidity.

    • MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz
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      8 months ago

      I don’t think I’ve ever said something like this as a thinly veiled form of screaming “I AM HORNY, SOMEONE DO ME”. If that’s what I’m feeling and want someone to know, I might go with something like “dude I need a wingman tonight” which essentially reveals the same information.

      I make sex related jokes, engage in wordplay, and puns, because it’s funny.

      And yes, you can include that stuff in the process of courtship, but if sex is the goal, sooner or later you’re gonna have to make your intentions clear and ask. But no part of sex-humor requires the people making the joke or laughing at it, be horny.

      Beyond that… People just like telling other people how they feel? We broadcast literally every emotion we experience, how repressed do you have to be to consider doing the same with arousal to be in bad taste?

      • Nougat@fedia.io
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        8 months ago

        OP’s comment is also part of the systematic objectification of women - especially considering the post isn’t remotely porn - so there’s also that.

        This isn’t funny. It’s weird and creepy and makes people the object of a bad joke who shouldn’t have to deal with that.

        We broadcast literally every emotion we experience, …

        We do not. Not all the time, not in every situation.

        • MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz
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          8 months ago

          So if I joke about sometimes eating too much, am I now promoting the mistreatment of the obese?

          While people everywhere have to deal with BS they shouldn’t need to, women among them, I can’t see how this particular sex-joke is one of those things.

          Humans are sexual, it drives us and fascinates us. That’s a biological fact. It’s as intrinsic to most of us as hunger and sleepyness.

          We all get to joke about it. When we look at something, and our brain goes “lol sex”, we say it out loud because it’s really damn funny how often the human brains of the people we are with did the same thing. And even if it didn’t, saying it makes it do it and it’s still funny.

          Fine, you didn’t think it was funny. That’s ok.

          Getting mad at everyone who does, without serious evidence of how the particular instance does damage to someone, isn’t.

          Yes. The jokes that demean people’s personhoods exist, and they should be put down. But I don’t see how “person attracted to gender enjoys seeing arousal in organs of that gender” is one of those.

          We do not. Not all the time, not in every situation.

          Obviously. But we can. Since when is it ok to tell others they don’t get to do that?

          Of course, no one’s taking their clothes off to have sex in public, but you don’t get to having sex in private, either, without the process of finding someone to do it with. Which to a greater or lesser extent, has to take place in public.

          • Nougat@fedia.io
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            8 months ago

            Since when is it ok to tell others they don’t get to do that?

            I didn’t. What I did say, in summary, was that it’s a shitty thing to do in this case, and in so many others so very much like it. You are completely free to do shitty things, and I am completely free to call those things shitty.

            But I don’t see how “person attracted to gender enjoys seeing arousal in organs of that gender” is one of those.

            It’s a constant drumbeat, an ever-present thing around every corner. Even in a mildly amusing picture of a cat posted to a “funny” forum.

            • MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz
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              8 months ago

              It’s a constant drumbeat, an ever-present thing around every corner. Even in a mildly amusing picture of a cat posted to a “funny” forum.

              I know it wasn’t intentional. But this is a sex joke. I can’t stop laughing at how spot-on this is as a description of the human sex drive.

              On a more serious note, it sounds like you simply don’t find this stuff funny. There’s nothing wrong with that. But unless you can explain how a particular joke contributes to the hardships of someone, you can’t just denounce it for simply not being your kind of funny.

              If your argument for why this type of humour is harmful, is simply that it’s everywhere, perhaps re-think why that is? You’re not even making a point about this particular joke, you’re simply claiming that the ubiquity of the subject of sex itself is bad? How does that make sense?

              Are sex jokes making people think about it all the time?

              Or is the omnipresence of sex in the human experience making people joke about it all the time?

        • Grobmobularb@lemmy.world
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          8 months ago

          Hey, I say I want to fuck Henry Cavil and I’m a guy. I’d drop to my knees so fast for him. I’m an equal objectifier.

        • Rolder@reddthat.com
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          8 months ago

          I got a strange feeling you’re a guy who is just assuming you know what’s best for women.

          • Nougat@fedia.io
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            8 months ago

            Because I disapprove of “jokes” that objectify people? This particular “joke” is clearly about women (mainly, also other people with vaginas), hence my more specific opinion above. But I don’t think that sexually objectifying anyone is “funny.”

            • pancakes@sh.itjust.works
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              8 months ago

              I think you’re getting backlash because you don’t know what “objectification” means.

            • Rolder@reddthat.com
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              8 months ago

              Man assuming he knows how women feel about a joke, hence objectifying them in the process, got it

            • Grobmobularb@lemmy.world
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              8 months ago

              You’re one of billions of people on this planet… who cares what you think. I didn’t write that in the hopes I would approval from Nougat!

    • saltesc@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      Can someone explain to me what makes people need to publicly express their sexual urges?

      Sure! 😀

      They’re not expressing their sexual urges, rather making light humour around something we all do (sex) and the common ground we all have with it. Like how we all poop, so comments about common experiences or preferences for pooping are a common ground for everyone, regardless of differences

      Like, what do you get from this comment? It’s not like it’s going to get you laid.

      Wh-…what? This just got weird…

      The only effect it has is making people who have no interest in knowing about your turgidity know about your turgidity.

      Why is your brain going here?

      And “turgidity”? Are you like me and was raised in a super oppressive religious environment, taught to lash out in angst at any common discourse of sexual nature? Shaming anyone for who they are because it doesn’t align with your ideals of how you want everyone to be?

      Give me a stone, I’ll cast the opener. Let’s get this fucking weirdo! How DARE they be that way!!!

    • GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip
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      8 months ago

      This isnt getting you laid either chief

      Its just a random sex joke. Nobody is addressed, nobody is put down. Just a dirty pun.

      • Land_Strider@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        It is an obnoxiously brain-dead, bland and overused joke, though. So much so that it can easily be understood as a staple of some stereotypes.

        • veroxii@aussie.zone
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          8 months ago

          So don’t laugh and scroll on. Maybe even downvote if you want. That’s what it’s there for.

          • Land_Strider@lemmy.world
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            8 months ago

            Yes, I do those things. There is also an option to comment, with opinions allowed, including both supporting and opposing types. I do this, too.

            • Slovene@feddit.nl
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              8 months ago

              Can someone explain to me what makes you need to publicly express your opinion on someones joke? Like, what do you get from this comment? It’s not like it’s going to get you laid. The only effect it has is making people who have no interest in knowing about your taste in jokes know about your taste in jokes.

      • voxel@sopuli.xyz
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        8 months ago

        nobody us addressed

        they’re literally referring to the girl in the photo

          • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            8 months ago

            Tbf, “the wrong pussy” does imply that he’d rather see the other pussy (in her pants) get wet rather than the one that is getting wet (the cat).

            That said I’m still on the “it was just a joke” side. You can only see her legs and being a meme she’s unlikely OP, it isn’t like he said “I’d rather see Alice here in the picture get wet,” it’s clearly just “hehe pun” and the pun was dirty.

            • GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip
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              8 months ago

              Honestly I didn’t even realize that is a woman, I thought a teenager at best. Not sure why I thought so, but it didn’t occur to me to see her in that context.

              • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                8 months ago

                Well, I suppose in this case “female” actually may be appropriate if we’re worrying about the age of the individual pictured, because of course it is literally impossible to determine this person’s age (or gender tbf) from this photo.

    • Grobmobularb@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      Because it’s funny…

      Don’t be so uptight. Learn to find humor in the world. Everyone is such a fucking cry baby about everything nowadays. I didn’t type that out in any way to think I’m gonna get laid from a random picture on the internet.

      Fuck me sideways….