- cross-posted to:
- [email protected]
- cross-posted to:
- [email protected]
Transcription:
A picture of a skinny female orc with the side of her head shaved. She wears an armless red dress and a black shawl, as well as matching red bracelets and a black choker with a gold heart at the front.
At the top of the image is the text “You may not like it, but this is what” in large bubble font
At the bottom of the image is a screenshot from the new D&D changelog, reading “• Orcs no longer have the Powerful Build feature.”
And below that, the text “Peak 2024 D&D orc performance looks like” continues the bubble font from the top.
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I wish the DnD/roleplaying community wasn’t as hopelessly horny as it is.
This community is a bit like a teenager: moody, a bit horny, is better with animals.
I resent that remark!
*resemble
Better add resentful to the list as well
Tbh I agree that “horny bard fuck dragon” memes are tiring. But I actually didn’t read this meme as horny. I thought it was just “hey, you expect your orc to be buff and muscly, but NO! She lithe and slim!” Basically just poking fun at WotC for removing a feature called “powerful build”.
… she?
That’s a femboy, friend
Y’all might be hopelessly horny, but I’m very hopefully horny. I know how to dance.
DM: … and of course Druids can learn Wild Shape, which allows them to transform into a beast that…
Player: STOP. I want to play that one. A druin or whatever.
I wish everything was more horny.
I wish it wasn’t so obsessed with being upset about miniscule changes.
A picture of a skinny female orc …
If I’d seen the pic without text, I’d have assumed it’s a femboy orc. Which I’d also find funnier since the morphology of female orcs already varies a lot depending on the artist’s tastes and intentions whereas male orcs are more consistently depicted with a strong build.
My money is on femboy orc as well. Unless she’s wearing a super tight binder or something, that looks like visible pecs rather than cleavage.
Good guess. That appears to be a character by Dross named Onyx, who is male.
https://www.patreon.com/posts/onyx-dross-oc-78426448 (locked behind Patreon)
https://civitai.com/models/309542/onyx-dross-character (AI link unfortunately, but shows the original image and names the character)
Yeah, it’s definitely AI copying Dross
Tags include “1 male” and “orc femboy”
Myth confirmed
My money is nowhere and I just ‘want’ it to be a femboy orc.
My money is lost, has anyone seen it?
There’s a thief on the lose, suspect n°1 is a femboy orc!
… there boutta be an explosion in the population of half-orcs.
Has anyone seen the bard?
[the bard IS the orc and he’s getting rizzed by the whole tavern]
XD
He’ll be in momentarily, hey hey.
…well, no: sixth-edition core rules no longer support half-races, something-something-against-racism?..
The solution to racism is not to let them breed together? 😕
We will cure racism through genetic purity!
…to be explicitly clear: i believe that we’re all sarcastically mocking WotC’s editorial choice to eliminate half-breeds from the core rules in order to combat real-world racism…
(i wouldn’t be surprised to see mixed races included as an advanced option in the new dungeon master’s guide, though)
Iirc it’s more of a lexical change: until now, half-something automatically assumed the other half was human, making the human race central in the setting. To allow for more liberty, most (all?) humanoid species will become interbreedable and you can choose the traits from one ancestry or the other.
That was how it worked in the playtest. The sidebar saying “pick a race you really are and pretend to be half the other race” is gone from the 2024 PHB. Rules as written, you can only be fully one race, this of course doesn’t actually matter as the whole thing is imaginary bullshit but in organised play it’ll sometimes come up.
I stand corrected, I didn’t know they changed it that way. Thanks for the update :)
so what Pathfinder does?
In Pathfinder 2e I think Half-Elf, half-Orc, and their equivalent of Tiefling and Aasimar are variants you can apply to other species.
I haven’t played enough pathfinder to be able to answer your question, sorry.
Also, I was wrong, see the other comment for correction.
We didn’t have half-races in BECMI, despite having a guy who was going by the title “Half-Orc”, he was just really ugly.
Inconvenience by snu-snu.
So, they’re like a different green version of an elf now?
More like a taller version of a goblin
Tall Goblin is called a Verdan.
I’ve always been joking about playing an “orc poet” in Shadowrun as a way to do something totally sub optimal :) TIL that you can also play orc in D&D. And cute orcs can definitely change the world building
Playing smart or charismatic orcs is totally fine in Shadowrun, it’s not that suboptimal. You have to spend a bit more karma at the start to overcome the lower starting charisma, but it’s not bad at all.
Yeah the PHB for D&D 5th edition only had half-orcs as a playable race, but they added a full orc race with the 2016 Volo’s Guide to Monsters. idk about the 5e remaster though because I haven’t played or been interested in following the news of D&D since about mid 2022. I just found this meme on [email protected] and thought it belonged here!
God dammit I really need to finish and polish the mixed heritage homebrew doc I have. Sometimes I want to be a half-orc-half-gnome and the game should let me
the new 2024 rules allow for this. All half races/species have been removed, and instead you get to mix and match any two you want.
They allow for it, but mechanically you still just pick one. The one I knocked together and mean to refine gives every species for traits, so a three-quarter-drow quarter-dwarf person is actually (slightly) mechanically different to a half-drow half-dwarf one
Um, actually, this is not a “bubble font”. The font used in this meme is called “Impact”, and it’s commonly bundled with MS Office. ☝️🤓
The spoiler description says the orc is female but it’s dross’ Onyx, it’s a male twink orc not a female
So?
I was going to say “misgendering is bad” then I realised its a bisexual joke >.>
Joking about my sexuality and self deprecating humor…it’s all I got
pat pat
smash
Not a player nor a DM, so correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t it basically photoshop human now? Grab a human, shift colors until skin is green…orc? :|
Yes it is. It’s like they wanted to do what PF2.0 did with Ancestries but also do a really shitty job of it. It’s fine though; 3.5e, 5e, PF1.0, and PF2.0 are all still out there for anyone who wants to run better systems that are still “DND.”
I’m actually a fan of the general change to races and background. It’s more role play friendly because all the tables available to me are run like we’re power gaming. Which of course makes us power game to stay alive. So now I can be whatever I want without worrying too much.
I’m pretty hyped for DC20. I backed the Kickstarter… now I just need life to fuckin’ chill long enough for me to pull a game together to test out the beta rules.
Isn’t that twink a Goblin, tho?
Also, I’m ok with this, helps diffirentiate them from Goliaths. And Orcs were never potrayed as Goliath-sized.
Isn’t that twink a Goblin, tho?
…No, it’s too easy…
we love an easy twink, especially one who’s a’ Goblin
I don’t think they made the 5Essentials Orc Warcraft-color.
omg I love the term “5Essentials” to refer to the new edition.
The fucks wrong with the hands? Is this ai generated?
Yes, blatantly. The earrings don’t make a ton of sense, the overgarment doesn’t make any sense, and all the metallic bits are kinda gloopy.
Nah this is hands drawn correctly but not well, AI draws hands well but incorrectly.
(relatively speaking, its still hands drawn better than I can)Edit: Then again the ears are odd and the black thing vanishing under the clothes is confusing. Normally AI can’t understand that objects going behind another object have to come out the other side and this passes that test but it also just looks weird in a way a human wouldn’t do.
Count the Fingers
Not all races have 5 fingers?
Do orcs? The thumbs aren’t looking great either, the righthand nail bleeds over and the lefthand thumb appears to point downwards.
I think you’re just looking for things. It looks fine.
There’s a fingernail coming out of the middle of her left hand, and it has a bonus floating finger behind it.
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That’s no orc that’s a fucking goblin. Orcs are massive. You’re on some delusional shit if you believe otherwise and that there are no species defining traits.
Did you read the text in the image?
A trait, as in an ability, doesn’t define the characteristics of a species. That’s incredibly stupid and asinine.
- Post 1: You’re delusional if you believe that there are no species defining traits.
- Post 2: Traits don’t define the characteristics of a species. That’s stupid.
…
So… you’re calling yourself both delusional AND stupid?
Your reading comprehension defies reality. Clearly rock bottom isn’t the limit anymore. Which part of “as in an ability” tells you I’m talking about species defining traits?
Hey, you’re the one who said the opposite thing in subsequent posts…
- In your first post you said that you’re delusional if you think there aren’t any species defining traits - implying you think there ARE species defining traits.
- In your second post you said that you’re stupid if you think there are species defining traits.
…
The only thing consistent between your posts is that you’re really angry about a joke.
Additionally, it seems you’re really struggling to find the thing where “powerful build” is a “species defining trait”. So here it is:
It’s in the same rules block as “you are a humanoid”.
According to your logic, “you are a humanoid” is also an ability, and not a species defining trait. Do you think it’s teachable? can I train for 90 days to become an abberation?
They’re not conflicting. I said there are species defining traits that don’t depend on there being abilities. Because, once again, you’re glossing over what I specified in my second comment about abilities, and not species defining traits.
5e does use “racial traits” to define most of the characteristics of a species other than age, height and weight though, but… since this is about height and weight, let’s work through what the rules actually say:
In current 5e, the current orc stats have this text under Height and Weight:
"Player characters, regardless of race, typically fall into the same ranges of height and weight that humans have in our world. "
There isn’t really anything, anywhere, in the orc kit that suggests they can’t be skinny or lithe. In fact, the key art for the Orc race depicts quite a skinny orc.
Now, despite this, someone might want to use the rules text to say “orcs are massive” regardless. If you do want to make this argument, the only thing there that supports the statement is a racial trait. Specifically: the Powerful Build feature, which implies that orcs are bulky.
If you argue “traits don’t define the characteristics of a species” then there’s nothing at all to suggest orcs should be big. If you do accept “traits” as being able to define the characteristics of a species, then you can point to the powerful build trait as evidence, but that’s all there is.
The joke in this post here is thus: If you were to take that feature out, you’re just left describing human builds.
Now you can have any mental image you like, run your games how you want, use whatever interpretation you want… You can say “I know what orcs are like from other media experiences, and they’re large.” That’s all fine. You can do whatever you want.
Just remember that this post is just a joke. It’s saying “look! they removed the only thing that says orcs are big, so here’s what happens.” That’s all.
