People will accuse you of condoning a trans person’s shitty actions if you gender them correctly, then turn around and use the proper pronouns for literal dictators
Exactly how I felt about those pictures of Andrew Tate in swim trunks with seamingly no budgie to smuggle. Him being shitty to trans, doesn’t make it OK to mock him for maybe being trans. Makes us no better.
Meanwhile Alfred will be going around misgendering people because he does not give a crap about Batman’s rule.
yeah it’s depressing seeing people decide that it’s okay to do asshole things if it is towards asshole people, I understand that you want to be a jerk back but it makes me feel like we lost the progress we just made towards not doing the asshole thing
Why would she break that gun?
I often ask people who deadname (bad) trans people if they also deadname Stalin. Oh, the mental gymnastics I often see…
what do you mean by deadname stalin?
His birth name was Iosif Dzhugivashili if I recall it correctly.
i do not give a chili, find your own
Yeah no way in hell I’m remembering that, none the less saying it.
Stalin was not his birth name
I only deadname twitter, am I chill?
Corporations aren’t people, they don’t have deadnames or pronouns. Fire away
Citizens United vs Federal Election Commission has entered the chat
(/s if it wasn’t obvious)
I think deadnaming the corporate entity Twitter is fine as long as a certain CEO continues to deadname his living breathing daughter.
Even with a trans person does something shitty, such as Blair White, Caitlyn Jenner or Ezra Miller, it’s not a free pass to misgender them. The only effect of that is the trans people in your life know you aren’t the ally you claim to be. You aren’t misgendering your friends because you are polite. It’s absolutely not okay, keep criticizing crappy trans folk, but when you intentionally misgender then you attack all of us.
I know some.of those names but have no idea what these people have done. Could you explain?
There is a literal nazi who chose the name Augustus Invictus and I will call him that as I wish for him the absolute worst. He is on trial so hopefully he gets the worst.
Also applies to misogyny in general. You can call out terfs (or just regular anti trans conservative women) for being bigoted shit faces without resorting to gendered attacks.
Exactly!
Any person regardless of their sexuality or gender can be an asshole.
As long as you don’t target them for their identity, you can call them out for their assholeshness.
Ooh, this is a great template, can be applied to all variety of bigotry, which people feel is ok as long as it’s aimed at other bigots, ignoring the fact that all they’re doing is putting more bigotry out in to the world, and telling marginalised people around them that they aren’t safe.
Yeah, it’s going pretty damn hard. There’s so many different things it fits on, like all the different kinds of bodyshaming (e.g. fat shaming, calling something “small dick energy”, talking about Trump’s small hands).
can be applied to any shitty behaviour tbh. Too many people think that once someone is shitty to them, they have free reign to also be shitty as a payback. They think they gave the asshole a piece of their own medicine, but actually they started rolling in the mud with them
Hard disagree.
Calling an asshole an asshole has no oppressive or marginalising power. It is a direct consequence of someone’s behaviour, and has no impact on anyone but the asshole being called an asshole. Take it a step further and switch “asshole” to “Nazi” then go read about the paradox of tolerance and the social contract theory that resolves it.
Misgendering on the other hand (just like using sexist, racist, ableist and so on language) reinforces the existing structures of marginalising and oppressive powers, and has a deep and harmful impact not on the, for example, transphobe you’re misgendering, but on trans people you’re supposedly attacking the transphobe to defend.
This outrageous comparison between someone shitty being called shitty, and a transphobe being misgendered, is exactly the kind of bullshit bigots and other bullies twist to make themselves the victims and whine about being oppressed when they are the ones oppressing others.
Don’t buy in to it, and definitely don’t play along, unless you want to enable them.
nowhere did i say that calling an asshole an asshole is bad. What i did say that acting like an asshole towards the asshole is bad, as it lowers you to the same level as them, and additionally reinforces the asshole’s behaviour & continues the cycle of assholery
I’m sorry, but what are you trying to say here? Why are you saying this to this specific image?
Ooh, this is a great template
Looks at Caitlyn Jenner We recognize your status as woman, but you are now on this council. Do not take a seat.
I will however misgender cispeople who are openly bigoted, as a “Uno Reverse Card” on their “Transvestigation” nonsense…
Wait I just realized that term is a pun on “Transvestite” and Transvestism has literally nothing to be with being trans… If I were to wear a woman’s clothing I’m not wearing the opposite gender’s clothing for kicks, because I AM a woman, god damn it htese mother fuckers.
Also it’s okay to deadname a corporation, or Jesse Mcree, or Dr. Robotnik. Probably shouldn’t deadname Mr. Satan, the name Hercule is on fucking life support and that’s probably for the best… But don’t be that dick who says they’re boycotting DBZ because Vegeta deadnames Goku by calling him “Kakarot”
I have sadly seen that argument before…
Wait what the fuck am I talking about anymore?
Wait what the fuck am I talking about anymore?
I… don’t know. But please don’t misgender cis people. It just makes it harder to convince them that misgendering is wrong if you also do it. The trans community is more vulnerable to misgendering than the bigots, so if we start doing it to people we don’t like, then it becomes some sort of schoolyard insult revenge term where we as trans folk lose.
No I specifically mean misgendering transphobes, not random cispeople.
Lots of transphobic cis people are agender eggs who don’t care about being misgendered because they can’t be. If you teach them what being misgendered feels like, they might decide it didn’t feel bad for them, so it must not feel bad for out trans people either. That’s teaching the wrong lesson.
I understand. Please don’t do that for the reasons I stated above. Purposely misgendering transphobes only encourages them to purposely misgender us.
The one exception should be teachers who refuse to stop misgendering a student, and then only done by the other students.
Even then, there’s probably a better way to solve the problem, instead of a petty “no U”.
I mean, there’s misgendering and misgnedering, isn’t there?
Accidentally calling a woman a man on the internet coz u didn’t know is not a big deal.
It can be something liberals use for their witch hunts.
Not advocating witch hunts but it’s a bit weird to call someone a man if you don’t know them. I see people on Tumblr a lot call trans women “man” and “dude” and then go “how was I supposed to know??” when corrected. Why make up genders for them in the first place?
not knowing someone’s pronouns & assuming wrong =/= misgendering
knowing someone’s pronouns and intentionally using the wrong ones = misgendering
Also, fighting years of muscle memory =/= misgendering.
I might have misgendered an old friend of mine shortly after they started transitioning, but they knew it was a mistake and didn’t seem to care.
Yeah absolutely this. I’ve seen too often in trans spaces when these sorts of accidents aren’t given any leeway or grace. We’re all human though, and it bothers me when folks are put down when there was zero malicious intent.
My mum deadnamed me more recently, despite me being out for almost eight years now. But she called me my older brother’s name first, then deadname, then Norah. She was mortified, and apologised profusely. How could I hold any ill will against her for that?
Lmfao. I’d never thought of that as an extra issue for trans people. My mom can go through her siblings, then my sister and I before getting my brother’s name right.
What is it with mothers accidentally using the wrong names? It’s not like most mothers have 5 children who all look nearly the same.
It’s probably best to mention it was an accident with people you’re not as close with.
My mother uses that excuse though, same excuse she uses to call me my old name, and to say that I’m a man. Horrible old witch. I know it’s an excuse because she doesn’t bother correcting herself, she keeps going and is insistent that I’m actually a man and that it can’t be changed.
There’s clearly a different intent there.
That sounds extremely frustrating. I hope you have other people around to support you.
I’m very glad that being non binary didn’t bring the pronoun changes to me (yet) otherwise it would be a nightmare getting my family to use them.
I think once or twice in the first couple of months of transitioning that started about four years ago and we’re still talking and helping each other indicates that there’s no hard feelings. It’s also not like I’m neutral on the subject otherwise. The people in this friend group know that I’m an ally on this subject. They also know I can even flub names when I get tired.
You know your mother doesn’t respect you. My friends know I respect them.
misgnedering
But its still funny how violently some people react to something that they do to other people every day(double standards)
Which people to which people? You’re imagining things if you think queer people deliberately misgender cis people on the regular.
I got really misunderstood. Im saying the same cishet toxic males who misgendender trans people, hate being misgendered because it attacks their fragile perception of themselves.
Perhaps it’s fun to turn it back on them, but by doing so you’re making it acceptable. Next time they misgender someone they’ll say “but libs do it to me”.
No im not saying you should do it, i agree with the post but they are huge hypocrits(transphobes)
