I started taking stimulants a month ago for ADHD, and wow. I mean, some of the effects were expected - the increased alertness, the focus, the slight uptick in motivation (I haven’t experienced the full ‘GO GO TAKE CARE OF NORMAL THINGS’ burst that some friends and online folk have had, but I’ve had a little motivation boost, and I’m grateful for every little bit).
But the counterintuitive effects? That I sleep easier and better now than I have in years? That my temper is much reduced because it doesn’t bang at my head like a jackhammer? That I can sit down and relax, because my focus isn’t darting to every little distraction? That I can listen to people talk without wanting to bash my head in because listening is idleness and idleness drove me crazy? The exact opposite of things that I would have expected from taking a stimulant, before I learned that I had ADHD and got put on them?
The human mind is whack
Medicine is fucking witchcraft
Wish I could say the same about sleep. Vyvanse really fucks mine up. Even if I miss a dose for a day. Takes ages for my body to get used to it before I can start sleeping normally (?) again.
It’s only counterintuitive when you don’t understand the why and how. Stimulants boost dopamine. Dopamine, to your brain, is like oxygen to an engine. It needs to be in balance. Too much or too little and the engine starts malfunctioning. Too much dopamine and someone gets high, too little and your brain starts misfiring. Then your brain starts making you act in ways to seek out sources is dopamine, which can lead to erratic behaviour.
I haven’t experienced the full ‘GO GO TAKE CARE OF NORMAL THINGS’
That behavior is learned, for the most part. The meds just help you follow through and stay on track to actually complete “normal” things.
Procrastination is normal. Starting to work on cleaning a room but somehow end up sorting screws in your neighbors garage is not normal.
Meds have limits and they aren’t magic. They are fucking awesome, but still, not magic.
There is a ton of stuff that you will need to sort out in your own brain over the next few months or years, TBH. Some ADHD’isms run deep. Some issues are correctable, some are not but that is for you to figure out on your own.
It’s taken me a year, but I have just about conquered my Dino brain telling me to “just finish it later, it’ll be easier that way.” Because it so won’t, stupid brain.
Two of my friends, also ADHD, have had a sustained experience on meds which was agreed upon by them to be something akin to “The Spirit of Cleaning visited me at midnight as usual; only now it wasn’t midnight, it wasn’t out of control, and it was on command both starting and stopping”.
I’ve not had any such visits yet (though I’ve previously, while not on meds, definitely had the “Midnight Spirit of Cleaning” visits) nor taming of the spirits, but I have found that starting small tasks and finishing them is much easier, so you know, I’ll fucking take it. The level of utter dysfunction I formerly had is… hard to imagine that it’s been most of my life 'til now.
I wasn’t medicated until my early 30’s, so I get it at least. The anxiety and the depression that came with not being medicated sucked ass as well, so take that very seriously if you need.
What do you have against my neighbor’s garage exactly?
It distracted me.
My ex girlfriend always found it fascinating that the first 2 lines of speed always made me relax.
Luckily I realized pretty quickly and didn’t waste too much money on coke.
Why? You get the normal effect too, you just have to pass the dose that does the witchcraft.
Is it weird that I have a mostly normal reaction to Caffeine?
I chuckle to myself as I listen to my friend tell me he shouldn’t have had a second cup of coffee at 14:00 because now he’s going to be up all night as I drink my 500ml can of V at 22:00 knowing full well I will be sleeping soundly in less than an hour
You guys sleep?
Idk what stimulants you mean but depending on how I slept coffee can often make me feel more tired than not.
Hopefully I’ll find out myself soon too. I’ll have to reschedule the med consult that I finally got though, accidentally set it to one of my few in office days
