although honestly, the guys need unsettling compliments once in a while. they need to shake their entitled sense of security and to learn that they are loveable
although honestly, the guys need unsettling compliments once in a while. they need to shake their entitled sense of security and to learn that they are loveable
As a cis dude that’s mostly straight, I want to cat call all the boys I see running in those short shorts with no shirt on. Jog your athletic abs over here baby. They’re good looking, and I hope I can make their day. Haven’t done it yet, though.
Everyone’s making some implications about you based off of that “mostly” which really isn’t cool. That “mostly” tells me you know yourself better than a lot of people
I don’t mind. I’ve made those jokes about myself for most of my life.
Sorry, didn’t mean to speak for you, it’s just a trend I notice a lot especially with genderqueer stuff.
“I enjoy this generally feminine thing as a guy”
And then a billion people come out of the woodwork saying things like “egg spotted” “who’s gonna tell em?” “Are you sure you’re male?” And that is absolutely toxic and harmful. So, I try to call out that sort of thing when I see it. Either they know who they are and are comfortable with themselves, in which case those kinds of comments can get real old real fast, or they’re not and those comments push them further away from exploring their identity. For trans people it’s called the egg prime directive, based off of the star trek principle of non-interference with developing planets.
I did that once. It turned out to be one of my friends I hadn’t seen in years.
Alright, then.
He said mostly
alright who’s gonna tell him
Mostly straight.
“mostly” carrying the weight of the world there
As another mostly straight cis dude:
I have always just genuienly complimented anyone that I think is really pulling off a look well, regardless of their sex or gender.
Gal in a truly stunning dress?
Guy with an uncommonly well groomed and styled mustache or beard?
Give a quick, specific, genuine, polite compliment, as you are walking by, so it doesn’t seem like you are cornering them or anything.
Worst case scenario, they don’t appreciate it, and you just keep walking.
Far more often? They reply with some kind of quick ‘thank you’, smile, keep walking, and now there is a little bit more happiness in the world.