• @[email protected]
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      810 months ago

      Going to forward it to my dad so he can slowly read it aloud during Thanksgiving dinner while a dozen people sit uncomfortably in silence, waiting for him to look up so they can awkwardly laugh.

    • @[email protected]
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      210 months ago

      Because it is, just translated to picture memes now instead of formatted to have big, flashing red-lettered words and bolded emphasis. I remember seeing this list at least a few years ago.

  • @[email protected]
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    7210 months ago

    Someone took a list of insults written about soldiers in the military, and rephrased them. Do you actually think teachers would say this stuff about their students in writing?

    This website just doesn’t get satire.

    • @[email protected]
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      1310 months ago

      I swear this website (collection of websites, social media network, whatever) makes me regret leaving reddit more and more every day. The people here are fully incapable of understanding sarcasm or humor. It’s hilarious

    • Franzia
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      310 months ago

      Yes lol, have you seen reports about NYC schools?

  • Beefalo
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    3310 months ago

    “When her IQ reaches 50 she should sell” is probably the wittiest one.

    I’m going to assume that none of these teachers are real, some corndog just pulled this thing out of the fucked up meme engine that makes facebook suck so bad. Some schmuck who writes jokes for morning FM drive time radio probably sat down with a pencil and wrote these.

    If it gets any worse it’s going to say “REAL FRIENDS STAY” in shitty cursive on a purple background and that’s it, that’s the whole meme, because facebook.

    I wonder how close to the bottom of that drain we are now.

    • kase
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      210 months ago

      “REAL FRIENDS STAY” in shitty cursive on a purple background

      Oh dear god why’d you have to make this so accurate, I feel like I’ve traveled back in time against my will

  • @[email protected]
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    3111 months ago

    My favorite is the “delusions of adequacy”, that one had to sting! The six-pack one though sounds like possible ADHD or some other learning disorder - your child is smart enough, but lacks the ability to do well

  • @[email protected]
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    11 months ago

    I hope the teacher who said #11 isn’t teaching reproductive biology.

    The sperm that makes it through to the egg doesn’t get there first. Multitudes of other sperms die weakening the wall, receiving nothing in return, only for another to slide right in and reap all the rewards and renown for their sacrifice. It’s basically the perfect analogy for capitalism.

    • MenKlash
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      411 months ago

      The free market is not, as the social Darwinists imagine, a struggle between rich and poor, strong and weak. It is the principal means by which human beings cooperate in order to live. If each of us had to produce all his food and shelter by himself, almost no one could survive. The existence of large-scale society depends absolutely on social cooperation through the division of labor.

  • @[email protected]
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    10 months ago

    Poor kid is probably neurodivergent and being told to “just stop it” or “just be normal” instead of actually receiving the help they need.

    • @[email protected]
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      1610 months ago

      Unhelpful advice I’ve received from neurotypicals who have, apparently, no theory of mind:

      • Just think about it
      • You should try making a to-do list
      • You’re just embarrassing yourself when you act that way
      • Oh but it’s not a big deal, see?
      • Calm down
      • Iron Lynx
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        310 months ago

        I once in high school was told about a thing I couldn’t do to basically “just do it” by a teacher. In a meeting about my support network. My mother almost wanted to hit the teacher in the head with the dossier.

    • @[email protected]
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      910 months ago

      Maybe some of them, but some people are just legitimately stupid beyond repair in a neurotypical way. It’s not their fault, it’s not a moral failing and they deserve empathy and respect. It’s just very unfortunate in today’s society.

    • u/unhappy_grapefruit_2
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      10 months ago

      It’s called satire. Although you don’t seem like the type of individual to pick up on that edit dam does this come off really passive aggressively

      • @[email protected]
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        10 months ago

        You know you can also analyze satire and comment on the hypothetical people involved in them too, right? Because satire is supposed to be a way to draw attention to real-life problems?

        • u/unhappy_grapefruit_2
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          10 months ago

          I don’t think there are many hypothetical teachers going around and commenting on there students like this. They sure as hell won’t have there jobs for long

          • @[email protected]
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            10 months ago

            And yet we absolutely do have a problem of very neurodivergent kids simply being called “stupid” and “a brat” by their teachers and being told to “stop it” and “just be normal” instead of, you know, the trained professional in child education recognizing those symptoms and referring parents to various resources for their child.

            See? Satire. You exaggerate and make comical a real world problem in an attempt to get people to recognize that while it may not be as extreme as in the fictional piece, it definitely is a problem that is happening.

  • @[email protected]
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    11 months ago

    Ah yes dilutions of adequacy. The best kind of dilutions

    Edit just not going to fix the spelling it sort of fits

      • @vrek
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        911 months ago

        No, his adaqucy is just diluted…

      • @[email protected]
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        611 months ago

        That is a very valid question. I have been awake since 3 am so I am going to blame it on that opposed to my inability to spell.

  • credit crazy
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    1510 months ago

    Number 5 is probably my favorite mostly because I like talking hyperboles and taking them even further

  • Tb0n3
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    1311 months ago

    It’s not just a problem with the teachers. The whole system is rotten. Many kids go unsupported and fail due to it. Some may try to join the gangs and think school is worthless, some may have need for extra effort which isn’t their from parents or teachers. It’s unfortunate in such a huge beast like the NYC public school system, just like many others.

    • @[email protected]
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      1011 months ago

      It’s really a problem with the parents, and that causes problems with the administration which causes problems for the teachers.

    • u/unhappy_grapefruit_2
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      10 months ago

      Ah yes it’s on the interweb so uhm ashrually it must be real guyz no one can lie on the uhmuhm aaaheww nn no one can lie on the interweb

      • Tb0n3
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        110 months ago

        The image doesn’t have to be true for what I said to be true.

    • @[email protected]
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      111 months ago

      We also spend more than twice as much per student than any other country for these results 😑

      • idunnololz
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        1211 months ago

        Where the fk is the money going because it’s certainly not going to the teachers.

        • @[email protected]
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          811 months ago

          To the schools of rich districts and the usually fraudulent charter schools some politicians love so much.

          • @[email protected]
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            411 months ago

            Don’t forget that most of the money that does make it to schools goes to sports programs. See my hometown’s new million dollar football field, ten-year-old textbooks and cancelled art program for reference.

            • @[email protected]
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              310 months ago

              Yeah, I admittedly HAD happily forgotten about that particular awfulness for a moment, thanks for the reminder 😮‍💨

    • Jo Miran
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      611 months ago

      Bold of you to assume the teacher has a basic understanding of any subject matter they teach. We need to stop assuming we’re going to get the cream of the crop when teachers are often forced to take second jobs just to make ends meet. If we pay more, then we can demand more, and someday we can expect more.

  • @[email protected]
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    1110 months ago

    Man the teachers in New York are really nice compared to the jerks I had to deal with growing up.