I would reject this pull request. Why is the indenting all over the place? Why is your keyword capitalisation all over the place? WHY YELLOW?!
Edit: the more I look at this the more it pisses me off. Wtf is going on with your kerning? Just random number and placement of spaces. Also, why is the table name in caps? Who does that? Select * is lazy. Do you really need every field about a girl? Really? Worst of all, not a limited request. I sware this is just the kind of thing that would return 30 million rows and brick the database for twenty seconds.
You are now a Certified Rejector. Stay sharp, keep the wheel rolling.
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You forgot some: Why is there no space after SELECT?
Why are boyfriend and smallwaist not questions like is_cute and is_crazy? Either all boils are with a verb or none.
Also why is smallwaist not in snake case? It should be small_waist (or better yet has_small_waist or even better waist = “small”)
Also also boyfriend should be null not false, this would solve multiple issues.
And finally the only positive thing is the * itself, because selecting only body would be even worse. 🤣
Shouldn’t boyfriend be a reference to another table?
BF has no referential integrity
That’s (part of) why it should be a separate table to map the relation “Relationship”. People can have more than one (polyamory, infidelity), and you could track fields like the start, end, status (e.g. flirting, dating, committed, engaged, married, ended) in there.
Yesssss, bro 😀
Guy with a belly asks for girl with a small waist. The half-assed ugly shirt will do it.
Instant woman repellant.
I feel confident in assuming the guy who would wear this shirt seeking “girls” between the ages of 18 and 26 is himself no younger than 45.
Ah I missed the age gap.
Would this guy qualify as an OUTER JOIN? (Sorry, SQL is not my native language)
I sure wouldn’t want him as an INNER JOIN
yesss I’m 42 so I can wear this shirt with pride!
And married.
At least he’s wearing the red flag on the outside.
One of the reasons women will find this repugnant is because they didn’t normalize their tables. Should be
boyfriend_id is null.For that matter, why is waist size a Boolean?
They allowed business logic to pollute the DB table, and “small waist” is a defined range in some confluence doc somewhere.
Or this is an analytics database where these are well-defined dimensions added for segmentation logic. 🤷
The dream
And why is cuteness and craziness binary?
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Why is there a separate table for men and women in the first place? Shouldn’t there be a person table with a many to many relationship with itself (because polyamory exists)?
To that point a person table with a relationship table. So this way you can reference relationship between two or more persons within the relationship table and that could be joined to the person table if needed. I don’t think you’d really be able to keep it within one table while exploring multiple relationships unless you’re storing a list of ids that is interpreted outside of sql. Also a relationship table would allow exploring other types of relationships such as exes, love interests, coworkers, family, friends, etc
Yeah it’d be a person table, and the relationship table indicating the ids of shipped couples. Do you think there’d need to be a status in the relationship table so we can tombstone exes? Or maybe started and ended date columns for each relationship so we can figure out whose cheating on who. But when about on-off relationships then? How would we model Ross and Rachel?
I think wed just need the following
- rel.id (primary key)
- rel.user_id (foreign key to person.id)
- rel.user_id2 (foreign key to person.id)
- rel.type (type of relationship)
- rel.start (non null)
- rel.end
From there you don’t need a rel.status because you’re not updating this rel.id entry except for the rel.end. if they started dating again later it would be a whole new entry, and then you could query their entire dating history to see if they keep coming back to the same person, dating around, playing the field, etc. Separately there could be a friendship relationship that is tracked so you could if they ended being friends after a breakup.
To that point a person table with a relationship table. […] I don’t think you’d really be able to keep it within one table while exploring multiple relationships unless you’re storing a list of ids that is interpreted outside of sql.
Yeah, that’s how many to many relationships work. Especially if you care at all about normalization which I assume we do since we’re debating the best way to model a SQL joke on a tee shirt lol. I thought this might be common knowledge but I’ve included a few links in case you’re curious. Many-to-many relationships
Also, a table having a many-to-many relationship with itself isn’t terribly special. It’s just not necessarily the most common thing ever. We can even express love triangles (as in unrequited love) using this approach. Proper couples could have two entries but unrequited ones would only have one entry on the junction table.
Also a relationship table would allow exploring other types of relationships such as exes, love interests, coworkers, family, friends, etc
Yes! Absolutely! You could have a column that describes the type of the relationship. Having extra information on junction tables.
I guess everyone sets up their own tables.
Or, if you allow for polyamory and non-hetero relationships, you probably need a rel table (and some joins in the query).
Maybe GIRLS is just a view…
Maybe it’s supposed to imply that boyfriend is an attribute of the particular girl. Like saying she isn’t someone’s boyfriend. It’s probably a holdover from the original data architecture and nobody ever bothered to modify the table later on in case there’s a select somewhere that expects that field to exist.
That structure doesn’t handle polyamorous and cheating relationships very well. It should probably have
and (select top 1 1 from dbo.relationships r where r.partner_a != GIRLS.id or r.partner_b != GIRLS.id)which would handle also LGBT+ relationships or relationships that are better represented as a graph.The relationships table should also have enum for relationship type. It might be friends, family, platonic relations etc. Also might want to check sex_drive to handle ace gals and something to do with kinsey scale not to bother lesbians.
Are you really doing relational data if it has nulls though?
Yes.
ERROR: permission denied for “GIRLS”
I can already imagine a 40-something year old manager coming into work wearing this
The pallette for the syntax highlighter is horrid. Hardly readable.
But it is highlighter colour!
Who says programmers don’t have a sense of humor?
No one. It’s just what you pretend people say to make yourself feel like some kind of special exception.
me. I said it.
Well then you’re a mean old doody head.
This is why we have codes of conduct.
Should be
age > (my_age / 2) +7Why would there be an age and my_age column on the table GIRLS?
Good point.
Should be
age > (@my_age / 2) +7FTFOP - now my age is some value defined outside the immediate query.
More likely, the GIRLS would be a view of some table persons and you could query
my_agefrom that table too.Thank you. I assumed the reader would be educated enough to guess I meant a variable. But yeah, should used @my_age
Pretty sure “People who know enough about SQL to know about variables” is a subset of “People who know enough about SQL to be pedantic about it” :p
A fair point :D
Because for each girl you meet, you might tell her a different age.
Ah, but if we care at all about normalization and that’s calculatable from the other columns (it should be) then it shouldn’t be a column. Unless it’s expensive and this is a view, of course.
Found the programmer thread that criticises the data model instead of the t-shirt
Or (my_age - 7) * 2 < age < (my_age / 2) +7`
Uh, no no. The rule is “half my age plus seven”. I’ve no idea what your other term is supposed to represent.
He’s saying it goes both ways. The upper limit is a women who you would be half her age plus 7.
This “rule” only works for a small set of ages from 14 ~ 30ish
If you are 14 then the range for “age” is 14 - 14
If you are 30 then the range for “age” is 22 - 46
If you are 40 then the range for “age” is 27 - 66At 30 the upper level is 16 years different; while it could work it is a big gap to bridge. It only gets worse the older you get.
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and smallwaist = trueand itty_bitty_waist = true
and round_thing_in_your_face = true
is_sprung = true
It should be waist_size=1
shitty taste <> “humor”
Gonna sound racist but deal with it.
I constantly meet asian developers (Singapore , India, China, etc) with this edgelord personality. They come to American conferences and meetups, say some wild sexist shit, and someone has to politely let them know not to.
Some backtrack. Some apologize. Some literally freeze up and pretend like it didn’t happen.
We do still live in a bubble in the west. We’re fighting for equity across genders and race, while some parts of the world are still questioning if sexual harassment against women at work is really that big of a deal.
Many of my guy coworkers have been (and are) sort of misogynistic, and homophobic (I’m in India). It makes me really uncomfortable. Might start reporting people to HR one day.
Just get to know HR first. They might be mysogynists themselves (even if they are female).
That last part is a face saving culture reaction. If you’re feeling culturally sensitive the thing to do is just move on and see if they do it again.
This is not funny and any man wearing this would probably not pass a similar test using any woman’s criteria. If I saw someone wearing this my first thought would certainly not be “hey this is a guy with a great sense of humor and I would like to hang with him!”.
