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I got overweight from the loss of my legs from a spinal injury. My fiancé left me and I haven’t held a serious relationship since. I am a supporter of all rights. So not all of us that are dateless. Are hateful misogynists. Some of us just had a bad deal delt to us.
I don’t think the two are fully related, at least not causally. If 1-3 are true, then there should be a large enough pool with things in common to avoid loneliness. If this specifically means sexual/relationship loneliness than, yeah.
Third spaces going away and moving a lot online has definitely had an impact on people hanging out outside of much more niche groups. I don’t care for organized religion much, but people of various backgrounds worshipped together. People had volleyball and other local leagues made up of all kinds of people who saw a flier for it. Men (not sure if women had something similar) went to fraternal order of the whatevers. Hell, dad and I went to Commodore computer enthusiast meet-ups. I think the loss of things like that has been bad for a number of reasons, including loneliness.
I know this guy who is absolutely ridiculous about this.
On one hand, he can’t stand women’s groups, gets upset about women’s sports, can’t stop dismissing anything that isn’t solely masculine like yoga, dance, and even rages on women artists and musicians.
On the other hand, has BEGGED OUT LOUD to people (I’m not even his friend) to get him connected with “chicks”.
I have no idea how to tell this guy he’s a miserable hateful fuck who will die alone because of his own personality.
Pretty funny that lots of now “feminine” activities like horse riding, yoga and dance were originally very masculine and women got into them when men moved onto to other crap like cars and whipping each other with towels in the locker room.
Yeah the dude in my old neighborhood who drove a Dodge RAM but rearranged the letters so it said “WAR” on the tailgate instead, and had a bumper sticker that said “KILL EVERYTHING” in that script that’s like, “badass Gothic tribal” but in reality is just floral minus the actual flowers… Not all clown cars are smol
Maximum “never actually been in a war” energy there.
In the US, women couldn’t get credit cards without a co-signer until 1974.
Historically, women had to have a man support them if they wanted options other than poverty. Your grandma probably didn’t have many other options - it might have worked well for her, but that wasn’t a choice made freely.
I think a lot of this is that relationships are a choice now. You have to be someone that someone wants to be with. This is a good thing, but it’s also a hard thing.
It sucks to be lonely and not get laid, but at the same time no one owes you sex or attention.
In 2013/14 my common law gf applied for life insurance on herself, she was a teacher. The insurance company didn’t want to insure her without me cosigning in case she ever lost her job and couldn’t pay the premimums. Like wtf. A) its not 1950s, B) if you can’t pay you lose the insurance anyway, so no risk to them.
I’ve seen this “”“”“meme”“”“” four times in the last week.
We get it, it’s low quality bait. Move along.
I don’t think it’s intended as bait, but jesus fuck, it sure is taken that way.
First time I thought the same. But it getting spammed as much, surely have a purpose. To me it smells like bait.
Dude. Take a break. The rest of us just got here.
Oh wow, another meme completely disregarding a problem many are struggeling with. But don’t worry guys and gals, it’s okay because it’s making fun of mens’ suffering. And men can’t be discriminated against.
On another note, has anyone figured out yet, why men are never emotionally available? It truly is a mystery 🤔
/s in case you can’t tell.
Silly men just need to understand that saying “I’m lonely” and “women belong in the kitchen” are equivalent. So don’t you dare ever talk or reach out if you’re lonely.
It’s a real shame that male loneliness is so quickly dismissed because it would be a great starting point to begin talking about how traditional male friendships tend to keep each other at a distance, and maybe come up with ways to bridge the gap so existing friendships can become deeper.
Instead it feels like the conversation just gets to this point where we all collectively shrug and say, “shame” and never really talk about it more than this.
Maybe, just maybe… men don’t have deep friendships because “empathy is gay”?
I mean yeah. To start with, casual homophobic phrase: “{blank} is gay” is a very common, very quick social check on behavior; it’s saying to be careful of being too effeminate, or too lame, uncool.
I think for children, they first use the phrase more to mean “lame”, it’s edgy for them and therefore interesting because it’s as close to cursing as they can get without cursing. I think that by the time they grow old enough to understand that the phrase can be homophobic, it’s likely that the phrase “don’t be gay” has already been repeated enough that it creates an unconscious tension to still try to “not be gay”, even if the phrase isn’t used anymore because “that would be gay.”
I think confronting children’s fear of appearing “lame” would go a long way in promoting men’s willingness to discover how to have deeper bonds with each other, even if it could be awkward at first.
edit: wording
In my career, I have had a lot of contacts with Saudi Arabian men. I’ve sometimes been a bit jealous of the ease and familiarity of their male-male friendships in that culture.
They generally have no qualms about just hanging an arm over a friends shoulder and just keeping it there for a protracted side-hug, seemingly without a thought.
Sure, there are other aspects of the culture that give me pause, but the easy familiarity is something that I think is beautiful.
A good friend of mine and I were open enough to hug and say “I love you man” to each other, even at work. The engineering staff sort of tolerates us but thought we were weird for showing feelings, the shop floor staff immediately started with the gay rumour.
Yeah one of the many ways our culture is broken. :(
But did you double down on the affection after the gay rumors? Because, unless you feared violence, it seems like a great setup to mess with Straighty.
We had our photo taken together and framed it.
Made me think of that video of George W. Bush walking hand-in-hand with that Saudi royal (MBS maybe? Don’t recall)
Yes, that snippet went viral because it is so incongruous in the USA, especially. But such things are common elsewhere and it is not perceived as ‘gay’ or negative in any way.
I think of my own experience of learning how to live as a gay man in the way our culture accepts. I just have to wonder how it would have been different if I had been raised seeing and experiencing males touching each other with casual affection and no overt sexual undertones.
I had to go to gay bars to first experience socially sanctioned touching between men. In the sexualized atmosphere of US gay bars, it was hard to just enjoy the closeness - because of the implications.
Silly men just need to understand that saying “I’m lonely” and “women belong in the kitchen” are equivalent.
Yeah, I think maybe you misunderstood the meme format? I don’t think anyone is saying those things are equivalent…
“I’m lonely.”
“Well, you probably deserve it then.”
There is a difference between thinking someone deserves it and them probably needing to do some introspection.
It isn’t being dismissed by this meme. It is being acknowledged as a real thing that really exists and is really a problem. You just don’t like the solution it proposes: stop being an asshole.
But I suppose it’s everyone else’s fault, right?
You miss, and reinforce my point.
This meme says the solution to male loneliness is to “stop being an asshole”. Which immediately presumes that the only reason a man could be lonely is because they are bad. It is telling you that entertaining the idea that men are suffering is pointless because their suffering is self-inflicted and the pain will obviously stop once the man takes responsibility and “stops being an asshole”.
But, and this is a wild thought here, what if not all male loneliness is caused by men acting like assholes?
Yes, it is obvious that someone who pushes people away will eventually find themselves with no one. But that is a one way street. It is not true that everyone who finds themselves with no one must have pushed everyone away.
Edit: And to respond to the “it’s someone else’s fault.” It may very well be that men are lonely due to their own fault. After all, people who are alone because they pushed everyone away will still exist.
There is a fear in these conversations that solutions will always take the form of, “what do we do for lonely men”. But flip the script for a moment and try to answer, “what can a lonely man do?” And I hope that in finding answers to these questions that lonely men can learn for themselves how to form deeper bonds.
There is not JUST a male loneliness epidemic. Across all demographics, humans are experiencing more loneliness than twenty years ago, and more still from forty years ago.
The reasons that men, and especially young men, are doing considerably worse still than the general population with loneliness largely reflects on those men. We’re doing stupid shit. And yeah, we need some help to stop doing stupid shit and instead start doing pro-social shit. But ultimately, that responsibility rests on us, not on those who would love to help us get our shit together.
And not to be cliche, but we’re genuinely talking about “Not All Men.” We’re talking about men who say: women are dishwashers. Who think: empathy is weakness. Who excuse: all their hatred and selfishness. And then who blame: everyone else. If you don’t see your self in this picture, why get worked up??
No. You, and the meme, are talking about men who are sexist and men who are lonely as if they are synonymous. Whereas, I’m taking a half second and thinking that maybe men are not biologically evil, and that there could exist a man who is not sexist and still feels lonely because male communication styles highly discourage intimacy.
The “not all men” cliche doesn’t fit here. That cliché is about the context of women talking about woman’s issues and/or experiences being dismissed or diminished by men who assert that because they specifically did not perform the action that women are wrong. This is different than saying that men are not a monolith and differences do exist between men that can be categorized.
Case in point: yes, I absolutely relate to the feeling of being lonely. I’ve been the 20 year old boy, living alone in a fly-infested apartment who thought to himself that he is going to die alone. I grew up with a dad who couldn’t handle that I bought a school folder with a cat on it because it was too girly. Even if I wanted to express what I was feeling, I never developed the skills to even identify what I was feeling to even begin talking about it.
It took three years of work before I was able to understand that I was able to want things for myself. I cried in the car after I finally let myself buy a fun treat for myself, and not as part of any reward for something I did, but just because I wanted to.
So yeah, I do get worked up when I see posts like this, because posts like this is everything that I’d see when I was trying to find out why I was feeling so lonely. And the advice they gave then was the same advice you’re giving now: “there is something wrong with you, fix your loneliness by yourself”. And maybe I feel like things can be just a bit easier.
You had me in the first half, ngl
The comments on this one really highlights Lemmy’s demographics. You can take the men out of reddit but you can’t take the reddit out of men lmao
What are all these “actually it’s misandry” guys suddenly doing here? Did the C-drive at Truth Social run out of space or something?
Yeah, I dunno if it was the recent migration or what, but I’m not a fan of the direction that lemmy seems to be headed. This was one of the few online discussion spaces that hadn’t been poisoned by right-wing ideology and it seems like that might no longer be the case.
Yes I know about blocking, I just don’t like doing it.
The “what about men’s issues” crowd has been here since the first big migration, mostly due to the demographic most likely to switch to Lemmy being techbro adjacent male liberals. It’s been simmering since then but only bubbles up when stuff like this gets posted. .world has been one of if not the biggest offender for annoying bullshit on this platform so just be aware when you see a comment from one of their users you’re taking a gamble on viewing one of the dumbest things you’ve ever seen in your life.
Blocking isn’t implemented very well. It prunes out the entire subtree. Would be nice to just elide the problem individuals and fold the subtree.
Yours was the first comment I read, and holy shit did it get bad. I had to bail less than a quarter through the thread. Sooooo fucking fragile.
The other side of that coin.
What’s the toxic female equivalent of Andrew Tate?
The Female Dating Strategy users back on the old site.
LMAO let’s not pretend like places such as /FemaleDatingStrategy don’t exist. Misogynists and misandrists are two sides of the same coin. If I have no problem saying that misogynists like Andrew Tate are shitheads, then you can admit that man-hating misandrists are also shitheads.
And don’t you start telling me “Oh, but woman-hating misogynists are worse” because then the conversation turns in to the “Oppression Olympics” and all people do is focus on arguing about who has it worse instead of focusing on actually fixing anybody’s problems. Both misogynists and misandrists are bad, and both should be condemned.
misandry doesn’t real
Misogyny and misandry are unfortunately both very real and very bad.
LMAO let’s not pretend like places such as /FemaleDatingStrategy don’t exist.
FDS has nowhere near the same reach as Tate, or other manosphere influencers.
And don’t you start telling me “Oh, but woman-hating misogynists are worse” because then the conversation turns in to the “Oppression Olympics” and all people do is focus on arguing about who has it worse instead of focusing on actually fixing anybody’s problems.
Yes, they are both dicks. But one group has active control of the most powerful government on earth.
Yes, they are both dicks.
Stop. Right there. That’s all you need to say.
Cut off that other crap about men “running the most powerful government in the world”. I guarantee the average man does not “run the world”. I sure as hell don’t. Do you? No? Then stop.
No more saying “My side has it worse, so your side doesn’t deserve to have your problems addressed”, neither gender should have their very real problems ignored.
There are no winners in the “Oppression Olympics”, only losers. The first step towards not being a loser is to stop thinking like a loser.
Cut off that other crap about men “running the most powerful government in the world”. I guarantee the average man does not “run the world”. I sure as hell don’t. Do you? No? Then stop.
I never fucking said that, liar. We were talking about misogynists and misandrists (this all started with talking about Tate and FDS, remember?) , and I said the former were running the most powerful government in the world.
“Liar”?
How about instead of having an attitude problem with me, we both agree that neither men nor women should be abused and both genders have unique issues that, in a healthy society, would be acknowledged and addressed?
Or are you just here to argue with someone?
You are the one arguing in bad faith by straw-manning me. You entered this thread with a whataboutism. And you have been up and down this thread accusing anyone who disagrees with you is guilty of “Oppression Olympics” or that they don’t believe men’s issues exist.
It’s giving “All Lives Matter”
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Oh? Because I’ve experienced domestic violence at the hands of a woman.
Are you telling me that my life does not matter?
No, but weaponising that fact to shut down discussions about gender issues is a shit thing to do.
Like yeah, that’s terrible, and you’re choosing to use that to invalidate other people who go through that? Wow.
That’s the reason I hate that saying so much.
It’s just a true statement. All lives DO matter.
But the hateful sub-text of the saying basically poisons compassionate people against what, in a vacuum, is just a basic moral value I hold dear.
In an ideal world, BLM would have switched to chanting “All lives matter” without skipping a beat: Deny the assclowns their slogan, simultaneously say “yep we’re people, too, part of ‘all’, get used to it”, simultaneously, ally with other groups the US police walks all over, like neurodivergent folks.
I’m vegan, too. But I don’t feel constrained that the utterance “All Lives Matter” now has negative connotations when delivered outside the context of universal empathy. People who say “All Lives Matter” are not expressing empathy, and struggle to access theirs. It’s disingenuous, they DON’T think that all lives matter.
Yeah, looknat the SAVE act and whose voting rights will be impacted by that. Women and transpeople, mainly. But they want us to think they are wittle victims because no one wants to be around a fucking bully. Amd they make fun of women’s loneliness epidemic no problem - the cat lady rhetoric. So they can stuff it.
Amd they make fun of women’s loneliness epidemic no problem - the cat lady rhetoric. So they can stuff it.
Great point.
So, no answer then?
So, no answer then?
Oh, you got your answer. You just didn’t like the answer - Probably because the answer acknowledged that men’s problems actually exist in this regard, and you don’t like that either.
You know what I didn’t like? My ex beating the shit out of me, and getting away with it every single time because just because she’s a woman.
Yep, that’s horrible and illegal. And she got away with it because the US is systematically sexist. The patriarchy sucks for us men too, I’m afraid. It demands us to be strong, unafraid, and impossible to hurt.
Feminism actually addresses this. Tate doesn’t.
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Tate belongs in a jail cell. Period. He is human garbage who makes the world a worse place to live in.
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I believe feminism is important nowadays, especially during the Trump years. The government is literally targeting women’s rights. That is unacceptable.
I might disagree with feminists from time to time, but I realize that overall, their hearts are in the right place. I can certainly not say the same about Tate and his ilk.
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I used to say twitter until the Musk bought it.
Probably bluesky since it’s basically old twitter.
I man a person who’s financially incentivized to push the agenda.
GamerGate-tier slop. “tumblristas” or whatever have nowhere near the level of influence, power or damage to society as the manosphere. When was the last time you read about one shooting up a school?
GamerGate-tier slop. “tumblristas” or whatever have nowhere near the level of influence, power or damage to society as the manosphere.
By that logic, if someone punches you with brass knuckles then you have no right to complain because brass knuckles have nowhere near the level of power or damage-dealing ability to a person as a gun does.
What? Saying one thing is on a different level is not the same as saying the other doesn’t exist.
What? Saying one thing is on a different level is not the same as saying the other doesn’t exist.
Well, a big part of men’s problem here is plenty of people do say that in one way or another - That men’s problems in this regard “don’t exist”.
I’ve experienced domestic violence before. She preferred to knock the shit out of me when I was sleeping. I don’t care how strong you think you are, you aren’t able to protect yourself when you are asleep.
I have flat-out had people tell me that “men cannot be abused by women, just like how a woman can’t r-pe a man” when I’ve told people about the situation.
How else am I to interpret that, other than “your problems don’t exist”?
Well maybe you should engage with the person you’re talking to right now instead of lashing out at arguments made by other people in the past?
I’ll engage with people when I feel it might be productive. Nobody likes talking to a brick wall.
yes, the few hundred people on tumblr who hate all men are just as bad as the incel influencers making millions every year who have sympathizers in many governments
fuck off
tumblr? Seems like a cool place to me.
I’m talking about people with these beliefs in positions of power and influence abusing that power and ruining people’s lives.
Just like OP.
edit: I was being an ass. ill shut up now
in positions of power
WHERE??? incels are running the US government, what power do your man-haters even have???
The power to ostracize and bully me out of a job for daring to get sexually assaulted by my female boss while being intersex-presenting-male, then continue to bully and ostracize me for the following seven years, fully destroying my life.
What happened to you is awful, and I know this sounds callous but it really isn’t… You need to understand that one anecdotal experience does not mean anything statistically. For every situation that you described there are hundreds (probably thousands if we’re talking worldwide) of women going through shit just as bad if not worse.
I know it doesn’t make anything better, but I think trying to understand and believe the truth, rather than the thing that makes me feel a certain way, is valuable.
Either way, I’m sorry that happened to you.
I know. But my anecdotal experience is what I’m still fighting and is my local challenge. That’s what I’m facing in my life: women being bigots. That’s what I’ve been fighting for almost a decade at this point.
Until those women reach out to make amends and help to heal the damage they’ve caused, their bigotry will continue to haunt me. And I will continue to haunt where I was killed. The fact is that unless these specific women can learn that all women can be and are just as bigoted and problematic as men, my life is stunted. Until then, I’ll settle for trying to convince as many other women to consider that they ought to take a serious look at themselves and their actions in the hopes it may help someone else.
Someone else in this thread posted a link to a book called “The Will to Change” by bell hooks. Unless women start having the will to change, to seriously consider that they might not be above reproach, they will continue to cause pain and destruction in their wakes. My biggest personal issue with what passes for white feminism in the 21st century is that it robs women of the will to change by convincing them that men and only men are the problem. This also alienates men, and fuels the fires of toxic masculinity and the Andrew Tates of the world.
As someone who is highly self-critical and has gone through many campaigns of self-directed change and growth, I hope that I can convince as many other people as possible to be willing to change and grow, to consider that they might have flaws to address. Because of my circumstances being a woman and being targeted by women, I am focused on convincing women. That means being critical of feminism and directedly trying to put it back on a track of promoting in this world the values of liberation, equality, and healing.
First step is getting women to admit that there is a problem. Often that involves bluntly holding up a mirror and highlighting problematic behaviours. That is my goal here. I’m also being loud about it and semi-doxxing myself at times because, in spite of the risks of doing so, I genuinely hope that what I say here makes its way back to me in meatspace.
Not-so-fun fact: If you call the domestic abuse hotline as a male who’s experiencing violence at the hands of a woman, they will just hang up on you.
Source: I was in a physically abusive relationship and tried to call the domestic abuse hotline for advice, and they hung up on me.
As someone who saw the cops go over to the neighbor’s house about 15 times… They don’t care about any kind of domestic violence 😊
I refuse to belittle or diminish anyone’s suffering who’s been through domestic violence. Doesn’t matter if they are a man or a woman, I hope that your neighbor finds away to get out of their abusive situation.
damn, im really sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed.
ill shut up now
If we upvote one, we should upvote the other. It should go both ways, or none at all
Yeah, that’s not at all what the male loneliness thing is about at all. Was the point of your meme to make fun of how ignorant people are about this particular issue for men or were you trying to suggest the issue is invalid and the result of misogynistic assholes? Because if it’s the latter I think you just demonstrated your own ignorance and should probably spend some time trying to empathize more with men and educate yourself.
Par for the course for cm0002 to drop a devisive clickbait “meme” for engagement and disappear. I understand we want Lemmy to grow, but is this actually the kind of content we want churned out?
He spams just the worst slop I’ve seen 24/7. Honestly I think he brings the overall quality of posts down on Lemmy. I’m glad I am not the only one that noticed how frequently he posts recycled trash.
A second person I can ask. What’s the epidemic then? If it’s not men failing to meet some pretty basic standards for empathy and kindness, what is it?
Not the person you replied to.
That’s easy it’s not not wanting to come off as a creep. Where do you meet them? I have been told you cannot approach women in the bar, work, gym, through hobbies etc. Only place that is okay is dating apps and they are awful for so many reasons for everyone involved.
You don’t want to be creepy so you don’t approach people. Then you get people calling you creepy for being lonley.
Honestly, I feel this comment.
I generally disagree with the whole “male loneliness epidemic” framing… But this is a legitimate point.
I don’t think the main message is not approaching women anywhere. I think the main message is actually making friends before making a move. Not just asking someone out.
I’ve had 2 relationships and am in a happt marriage going on 10 years, and each one started by being friendly and sharing interests, because then it’s natural to go do something together sometime.
Don’t overcomplicate it, just be friendly and make it natural to spend time together.
Ahhh, yes. Intentionally being on “the hunt”. It’s a shitty model, it rarely works, and I don’t understand why it persists.
This is part of the fallacy that men are fed.
I should probably make a video on the subject, but I doubt people would listen. But the way to meet women is the same way you meet new male friends. How do you do that?
It’s already a stretch to assume that men complaining about loneliness are happy with the number of male friends that they’ve got, but it’s a bigger stretch to assume that what they did to get their male friends should also get non-male friends. There are still men who haven’t realised that women are people and that to befriend them, you need to talk to them as if they’re people, but they’re not the ones referring to a male loneliness epidemic, and would instead blame conspiracy theories where crazed feminists want to do evil deeds or whatever nonsense it is that the likes of Andrew Tate peddle. Plenty of men just don’t meet anyone new, and on the rare occasions when they do, it’s when engaging in a male-dominated hobby or at a male-dominated workplace, and so it’s another man. E.g. for reasons I don’t understand, all the bars near me where it’s quiet enough to have a conversation (the bare minimum to befriending someone) are almost exclusively attended by men. After you’ve shown up a few times, you might be friends with the regulars, but no matter how effectively you make friends with them, they’ll still all be men.
You’re probably right that no one would listen if you made a video, as anyone who needs to hear the thing you’re trying to explain is too entrenched exclusively watching manosphere influencers, and anyone without that kind of terminal brainrot already knows what you’re trying to tell them.
Maybe this is the core of what I failed to understand. The male loneliness epidemic isn’t about women. We don’t have male friends either.
It also is more than a male loneliness problem. There has been a fundamental shift in society in the last decade or so, as we get more connected online we seem to be becoming less connected offline.
When’s the last time you asked someone out?
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It’s complicated because there are a variety of contributing factors and it’s not the same for every lonely man. There are some societal mores in certain demographics (e.g. urban Black men, traditional Hispanic men, traditional Southern White men) where men are expected to not talk about emotional pain or express it only in anger. They’re expected to solve all of their own problems and even complaining about a problem you’re struggling to solve makes you look weak to your peers. These kinds of societal forces cut men off from emotional support even when they have friends and makes them feel alone and abandoned even though they have people in their lives.
Then there’s stuff like boys/men getting addicted to video games and not socializing enough in person with people to create friendships groups outside of discord, that kind of thing. Like I said, it’s multifaceted. But it’s no joke and it’s not about misogyny.
Being taught to hide your emotions is part of my point. It stunts emotional growth and then they struggle to communicate or understand feelings. Which I believe leads to treating other people like objects.
I’m sorry, but that’s just not true. Being taught to hide your feelings doesn’t necessarily stunt emotional growth, and even if emotional growth is stunted, that doesn’t necessarily lead to treating other people like objects. You’re making a lot of assumptions about how people mature under these conditions. Do you have any professional sources to back this up or is it just your personal view of the topic?
I’m really struggling to get through this video. " Men are in a crisis and no one really cares"
The Fuckin feminists care. The patriarchy, and how it’s all been set up, is exactly the problem that caused all of this. The tight gender roles that need to fit certain models… That’s what feminism is here to fight.
Depends on your brand of feminism. Sounds like that’s about to become a no true Scottsman argument.
Where is all the care when I see women choosing the bear? Where is all the care when women go on TV saying men are useless and we don’t need men then laughing about it? What specifically are you talking about when you say the patriarchy is to blame? Cuz that just sounds like things I hear in the video that you struggled to get through.
Men are lonely? That’s men’s fault! Cool, guess I’ll go kick my own ass? This is why the left is completely losing men as a demographic.
And I’m saying this all as a registered Democrat in a loving relationship who is not lonely.
And I’ve said this all before the election, got down voted for it, and then lo and behold a lot of men shifted to Trump, especially in the younger demos, which have traditionally been more progressive.
You ask the average man if they feel feminists care about them and I doubt you’ll get a favorable response.
“where is the care when women are talking about themselves and their problems”
The care is when they point out that gender roles are stupid and that everyone should go to therapy.
there is a
maleloneliness epidemicFTFY
I think it’s phrased like this because it’s less acceptable for men to express feelings like sadness or loneliness. men and boys who are lonely and alienated can more easily fall down the Andrew Tate/4Chan/Jordan Peterson/blackpill pipeline which yields violent extremist behavior. Obviously it’s not only men
Yes, it’s because despite the problem being the same for everybody, the “treatment” has to be very different. So it’s better if you break it down into two different epidemics.
And one gets more attention because every single well known and applied procedure to fight the epidemics don’t work for them.
“All lives matter”
It’s pretty much everybody but go off I guess
https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-social-connection-advisory.pdf
There are multiple ways to get to the loneliness stage. The meme identifies one way that is self inflicted which starts with misogyny and spirals from there.
The problem is the format of the meme implies that the last panel is invalid, and that the conclusion “there is a male loneliness epidemic” is something only women hating clowns believe.
I guarantee if the last panel was stated like “why won’t women date me” or “I’m lonely” or even “I’m only single because of the male loneliness epidemic” then there wouldn’t be nearly as much backlash in the comments
Yeah, it’s more than just incels suffering.
But I comment to other people on the internet, that’s close enough
/thanksimcured
Very true. But when it comes to loneliness, I’ve heard far more about “the male loneliness epidemic.”
The male loneliness epidemic is often cited to me and used to silence women/NB folks when we try to discuss our safety and support groups. It is supposedly women’s (and other not-men’s fault) that men are lonely.
I just searched it up and apparently NPR has something about it now. https://www.npr.org/2025/02/17/1263527043/its-been-a-minute-male-loneliness-epidemic-real
Thanks for the link, interesting read( I read the transcript). A section here:
VOLPE: Yeah. Yeah. Like Harris said, it’s an easy solution. And you know, speaking of, like, some of these people, like Andrew Tate, like, their messages of, like, you know, you need to have women around you only to dominate them. And, like, those sort of messages, I think, are very appealing for men who feel like their place in the world is being threatened. And so it’s very easy to say, like, oh, yeah, like, maybe they just need a girlfriend or a friend and, like, they’ll be better.
And I think that maps neatly onto the way that we socialize boys and men, too, to sort of value that one romantic relationship, and, like, that is the thing…
This might be one of the reasons. But it is interesting that the survey says it is only 1% less of women than men feeling lonely. Would be interesting to know the country too. Not all societies are the same, and in some friendships between men are similar in connection like between 2 women.
It always reminds me of a This video
Do you have a link not hosted on Twitter?
That’s just where they posted it
I doubt the first 3 statements are the same person as the fourth in most cases
Why
I just figure if you called women dishwashers you wouldn’t know big words like epidemic. That and it’s possible to be lonely without being sexist.
Also, I hear the 4th way more often than the other 3
That and it’s possible to be lonely without being sexist
Sure, but people often misdirect their anger at the wrong things.
You are right. And snowing similarly implies that it’s cold outside. But you cannot reliably conclude whether it is snowing if you only know it is cold.
Death of third places and the tech takeover of social interaction is why men and women seem to hate each other now. We don’t have much opportunity to meet romantically in person and the online space pits extremists against each other until all the regular people believe that’s just the way it is in real life too.
Can’t overlook that women being, for the most part, economically equal for the first time ever gives them more opportunity to choose as well.
The people speaking about male loneliness epidemics aren’t the incels right? I think trying to understand the problems related to masculinity in society is exactly the opposite, trying to combat incels and the like. It has nothing to do with blaming women (at least in my experience)
