• Bilb!@lem.monster
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    2 hours ago

    In my family, the more conservative guys are the clean shaven ones. Weird.

  • HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world
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    5 hours ago

    Be me

    Liberal uncle in conservative/ trump family

    Fly to red state for family member’s funeral

    Get made fun of by all family members in public at the funeral reception

    • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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      3 hours ago

      My grandma never met you. She lived to be 103, and died last October (2023).

      My grandma loved you. She wanted you to do well, and be happy. Just as she did with everyone on earth. It’s physically impossible for her to host a dinner big enough to feed everyone on earth. But the logistical impossibility is the only reason she didn’t do it.

      My cousin is a lesbian. She had been married to a decent man, had two kids. Good family man. Married for nearly 10 years before she discovered she was lesbian. The breakup was civil. He did nothing wrong. They both still loved each other, and loved the kids. He was still welcome at the table, as was my cousins new partner. My cousins mom was NOT accepting. When my aunt tried making a scene, my grandma said “Melinda…I won’t have hate at this table. You love your daughter. I don’t ask you to agree with your daughters lifestyle. But I do ask you do not bring hate into my home.”

      My grandma was a teacher in her 20s. She lived in a small but growing suburb, and essentially raised the whole town. She got promoted several times as the years went on. Eventually being the district superintendant. She LITERALLY was responsible for raising thousands of kids, who were everywhere from the boomer generation to the millenials.

      She had a simple philosophy. Which was that she loved you. She would put aside the world to hear what you had to say. My grandpa used to joke that when WWII broke out, she was having tea with the neighbors and helping raise their kids. Just discussing the day. Choas and war breaking out across the globe, but she was determined to hear about you. And for the kids, she would teach them that everybody was different, and we need to love everybody for who they are. Not who you want them to be.

      And she loved everyone. Even you. Even though she never met you. She always said “Everyone is welcome in this home, as long as they take off their hat at the dinner table, leave hate out of their hearts, and tell me about their day.”

      The only time I ever remember her saying anything negative, was somebody had said during trumps first term something he was doing in office.

      Her reply was “I just do not like that man.”

      AIRHORNS!!!

      I know that sounds so non-aggressive, but for her to say she didn’t like someone would be like a world leader declairing WWIII. The room literally went quiet.

      So I try to live my life to keep making Gram proud. Accept everyone, even if you disagree with them. You can’t just accept those you get along with, and not create an echo chamber.

      So if you’re ever in Cleveland, you can have a meal with me. And maybe when you fly out of state to be with family, you can teach them about letting the hate go.

  • bizarroland@fedia.io
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    6 hours ago

    They don’t think we’re open minded and understanding.

    They think we’re ignorant of how the world works, condescending, and irrationally judgemental.

    I’m not saying this is how we ARE, this is just how they view us, and because they view us like that from the very start, there is no opportunity for meaningful dialogue.

    It is bi-directional prejudice, and only by acts of understanding and patience and wisdom can that be overcome.

    • apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world
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      6 hours ago

      Agreed, for the most part. I’m never going to be impartial and seek understanding with a racist Nazi. They will have to understand my fist.

      • RedditRefugee69@lemmynsfw.com
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        2 hours ago

        That’s fun to say, but where they balk is they think you draw too big of a circle around groups to label them “nazis.”

        So to them, you may as well think anyone who likes guns is a nazi.

    • TheFogan
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      6 hours ago

      Pretty true, obviously most racist biggots don’t see themselves as racist biggots. They don’t see us as “open minded” they see us as close minded to their views.

      • skulblaka@sh.itjust.works
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        6 hours ago

        Depends on the person. I’ve been told to my face without a hint of irony that “you’re so open minded all your brains fell out”.

        • Zink
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          24 minutes ago

          Being convinced to give a shit about other people just shows that you’re gullible, to them.

        • bizarroland@fedia.io
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          3 hours ago

          I spent most of my childhood being repeatedly informed by my incredibly Republican family that I lack common sense.

          Yet, I have the common sense to know that if you let people do whatever the fuck they want to do with their own bodies and lives then they’ll stay the fuck out of your body and your life.

          Perhaps that is an uncommon sense. However, it should be a common sense but the people who claim to have common sense fail to understand that consistently.

          Maybe common sense is not all it’s cracked up to be.

      • bizarroland@fedia.io
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        6 hours ago

        And, their views typically do not include the things that most of the people I know hate the most about the platform that they ascribe to.

        They just think being Republican will make them wealthier or fix problems in the country or make the world a better place.

        The single issue voters have an opinion on a single issue and everything else doesn’t matter compared to that one thing.

        They don’t care about all of the bad as long as the single bit of good can be accomplished, and they don’t care if you think that single bit of good is a bad thing.

        They don’t care to talk to or be dissuaded by their family members who are not approaching them with a spirit of love and care for them.

        Beside that, it’s not mentally or emotionally healthy to live spring-loaded with ontological traps that can be fired off with a single phrase to bring down judgment and the fires of hell on the people you meet.

        They’re not going to want to hear you if that’s what you’re bringing to the table.

        • Justin@lemmy.jlh.name
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          3 hours ago

          Of course, after Trump in the white house, it’s kinda irrelevant.

          Historians have a word for Germans who joined the Nazi party, not because they hated Jews, but out of a hope for restored patriotism, or a sense of economic anxiety, or a hope to preserve their religious values, or dislike of their opponents, or raw political opportunism, or convenience, or ignorance, or greed.
          That word is “Nazi.” Nobody cares about their motives anymore.
          They joined what they joined. They lent their support and their moral approval. And, in so doing, they bound themselves to everything that came after. Who cares any more what particular knot they used in the binding?

          • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            2 hours ago

            Sure, let’s just casually label half the fucking country as Nazis. That definitely worked last time.

            Prime fucking example of exactly what their first comment was talking about.

    • hddsx@lemmy.ca
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      5 hours ago

      Hi,

      Person struggling to still call self conservative. I don’t like lefties either - they hear the world “conservative” and thing MAGA Nazi shitheads immediately. And they are constantly condescending and judgmental, yes.

      But that doesn’t change the fact that if you voted for Trump, you are either a piece of shit or you’re stupid.

      It also doesnt mean that we who can understand Trump has now determined he can and will abuse his power shouldn’t try to dialogue with Trump voters without being shitty to them. You’re not going to turn a vote (if there still is one next time) by being an asshat. Just make sure they’re not hardcore Trump diehards because time is precious.

      • PunnyName@lemmy.world
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        4 hours ago

        Here’s my problem with the “not all conservatives” mind frame: Nazis and maga have security attached themselves onto conservatives, and conservatives who “aren’t those guys” aren’t doing anything to eradicate those parasites.

        If you have 10 conservatives and 1 Nazi at the dinner table, you have 11 Nazis.

        • hddsx@lemmy.ca
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          4 hours ago

          I agree with the Nazi statement.

          I did try to eradicate them. I voted Harris. The fact that so many people voted Trump after seeing what he did is what makes me question calling myself a conservative.

          But I’m just some person in a some county in some state. I’m not a registered Democrat or Republican. Other than voting, I’m not sure what I /can/ do

      • TheRealKuni@lemmy.world
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        5 hours ago

        Hi!

        A while back I myself made the sometimes painful journey from a conservative to the progressive I consider myself now. I know you didn’t ask, but here’s some stuff to keep in mind.

        The internet has no place for subtlety. People desperately want the dopamine rush that comes from righteous fury, defending one’s viewpoint and crushing those who disagree. It’s true of a lot of people, and I’ll be honest, I’m guilty of it on occasion. It just feels so damn good to be right.

        But in my experience, most people in life don’t really act that way. I mean, in high school I occasionally got shit on by people who were “lefties,” but I was usually asking for it. More generally, people were much more likely to ask me questions and discuss our differences. They may have been judging me, but I never got that vibe. It’s just easier to see the person you’re talking to as a fellow human in person. And those people were integral in helping me realize that a lot of the stuff I was seeing online about feminazis and whatnot was simply more rage product, designed to get that part of the brain pumping and let me feel good and superior to someone else.

        Removed from the left vs right rage online, I found that it became increasingly difficult to call myself “conservative.” Not because I was worried about how people would think of me, but rather because the more people I met and the more I learned about the world, the harder it was to reconcile what I knew with the views I had held. And when I would try to provide context or data to my fellow conservatives, they refused to listen. Anything that didn’t reinforce the views they held, they didn’t want to hear.

        So much of what I thought I knew about “lefties” was from online takes and screenshots that others shared, but none of that matched my experience with real people in real life. And I’ve been so grateful I had the chance to spend time with people with significantly different lived experiences from my own who didn’t shun me for my views but were friendly and helped me become a more empathetic person.

        Of course, this goes both ways. The average conservative doesn’t want to kill gay people or black people. They aren’t represented by the extremes either. Generally speaking, people just want to live their lives. I truly think one of the biggest differences between progressive and conservative mindsets is about how many people whose lives are different from your own you’ve gotten to know. It helps us be less afraid of one another. It’s part of why densely populated areas tend to be more progressive, I think.

        Anyway, I wish you luck in your journey. Hope you didn’t mind my musing here!

  • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.today
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    6 hours ago

    If they don’t kill you for being too open-minded and compassionate, you’ll live long enough go see yourself become the racist uncle

    • Ech@lemm.ee
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      3 hours ago

      Nah. The “old age makes you conservative” adage is bs. I may not always be precisely on top of current trends, but I’ll never be a racist, hateful shithead just because I lived a bit longer.

  • saltesc@lemmy.world
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    4 hours ago

    Open-minded and understanding?

    This is an ironic comic. I’d say it’s making fun of both sides, but you know that’s not the intent so it’s just super cringey.

    Edit: Oh, it seems I’ve upset the open-minded and understanding. Perhaps the irony has flown over their open heads. Enjoy distancing your family this Thanksgiving and not understanding why you grow less tolerated and heard by uncles.

    • Seleni@lemmy.world
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      2 hours ago

      Yes, yes, we should totally be understanding of the people who want to see my cousin dead and my uncle run out of the country.

      /s because there are sadly a lot of people who legitimately think this way

      • bizarroland@fedia.io
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        3 hours ago

        Reminder: there is no such thing as the paradox of tolerance.

        The rules of tolerance only applies to the people who abide by it.

        Therefore, you are tolerant of tolerant people if you abide by the rules of tolerance. You are intolerant of intolerant people if you abide by the rules of tolerance.

        It is very straightforward, the only pathway to paradox is from a lack of lexical understanding of the rules of tolerance.

      • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 hour ago

        Any possible reason why anyone could have voted for Trump besides being racist or an idiot. That blanket labelling half the country as Nazis wasn’t effective last time and isn’t effective now. That a large portion of the populace feels so desperate for change that they were willing to vote for the fucking cheeto supreme.

        I voted for Harris, and I completely believe Trump was the worst fucking choice the voting populace could have made, but unless you’re actually calling for the extermination of roughly half the country there has to be some attempt at understanding or bridging the gap wherever it can be bridged.